Change Management: Why Transformation Efforts Fail

Some change management models have more steps – some have fewer. In all honesty, no matter if you call it restructuring, total quality management, cultural change or any other name, if the majority (70%-80%), of your senior leadership team AND your employees do not share a vision and are excited by the prospects, your change management goals will be at serious risk.

Whether you are working on how to include working from home into your hybrid workspaces or looking to bring a new Supply Chain Solution into your workspace, your process and how you approach change does matter.

Your process matters because it will be the path everyone shares. But what model should you choose? There is nothing wrong with many of the models out there like Kotter’s eight stage or McKinsey’s seven stage models. Your choice should work IF their steps are diligently completed. That said, I do like the simplicity of the ADKAR model. I also like how each of step of the ADKAR model unmistakably embraces the recognition that people and a commitment to a shared vision are at the centre of change – especially step number three. Too often I see too much focus on process and policy and far too little on approaching your employees and taking the time to discuss the benefits of change and explore options with the people change will have the greatest impact on.

The ADKAR Model:

1. Awareness of the need for change

2. Desire to participate and support the change

3. Knowledge of how to change

4. Ability to implement desired skills and behaviours

5. Reinforcement to sustain the change

So, if you are wondering why transformation efforts fail and how you can avoid them, I recommend that early on you take a deep breath and patiently include everyone in discussions as you explore all the important questions and opportunities that arise as you work through each of ADKAR’s five steps. What are the important questions and opportunities that will arise? I suggest nobody can tell you until you begin including your greatest assets – your people.

Thank you for spending time with me today and exploring our quick article about Why Transformation Efforts Fail. I hope this has helped guide you through your Change Management journey.

Bruce

Learn More About Bruce Mayhew

Toronto corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting is in the people business… it just so happens that training and/or executive coaching is involved. Let us help you improve your productivity and employee engagement.

To learn more about how leadership training can to improve your skills call us at 416.617.0462.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting's most popular programs are Email Etiquette Training, Difficult Conversations, Generational Differences, Leadership Skills Training and Time Management Training

Related Workshops That Drive Business Success

• What Is Servant Leadership?

• The What, Why and How of Vulnerable Leadership

• Email Etiquette Training

• The Role of Empathy during Difficult Conversations at Work

• Difficult Conversations: Never Easy - Always Worthwhile

Toronto based corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting proudly offers leadership training and professional development.

The What, Why and How of Vulnerable Leadership

Researcher, speaker, New York Times bestseller Brené Brown is an expert on vulnerable leadership and the importance for us all to have courage, put ourselves out there and show more emotion. She – and others I’ll mention throughout this article write and speak about how vulnerability and building a culture of creativity, trust, and collaboration is important for organizations, leaders and of course employees to be successful and engaged.

Let’s start this discussion by exploring what vulnerability is. Vulnerability may look different for each of us. It depends on our personalities, our upbringing, our experiences and so much more. For some, vulnerability can mean fearing not always having the answers. It can mean searching for the courage to ask others for help. We can also feel vulnerable when we [should] say, “I was wrong” or “I made a mistake.” And I bet all of us have felt vulnerable when we’ve entered a room and discovered we don’t know anyone and/or don’t see anyone who looks like us.

So yes, there are many ways to feel vulnerable. At this point, as a leader you may be thinking, “If you want to see vulnerable – ask me to add this to my plate. How can I possibly find time in my already far too long To Do list to add one more thing – especially the idea of vulnerability?” And yet you still want to be the best leader you can be for yourself and your team. This is what makes you a terrific leader, even if you don’t [yet] have a formal position as a leader. So, what I suggest is that as you take a few minutes to read this article, ask yourself, “Is there one small step I can take?” And as you do this I invite you to think of vulnerability from a position leadership strength, not a weakness; an example of positivity and opportunity.

Now that we have a shared the idea to see vulnerability as a strength, let me outline two more important areas we will explore in the next few minutes:

1. The positive attributes of vulnerability.

2. How to build a culture that is safe and where everyone can be vulnerable.

The power of vulnerability in leadership. How great leaders see vulnerability as a strength, not a weakness.

You and I both know that leaders don’t have all the answers.

Success in today’s high tech, fast paced economy requires creativity and innovation at all levels of the organization. It also requires alignment across the team on our shared vision, mission and values (which I recommend be fine-tuned every year). For creativity and innovation to exist, every team and every company must work together towards creating a culture where people feel welcome to be themselves and show their emotions to their team, coworkers, clients, and suppliers. This doesn’t happen by accident.

When we believe we can be authentic at work, we are able to help build inspired solutions that will make us all proud and successful. The best leaders aren’t afraid to be vulnerable. Leaders who see vulnerability as a strength are able to build teams who are willing to dare greatly as Brené Brown might say. By embracing vulnerability, leaders create an environment that nurtures trust, opens channels of communication and listens to new ideas – from everyone. This is where a leader’s real strength can flourish as they help others collaborate and share their expertise.

In contrast, when leaders try to be all knowing and all-powerful they are not protecting themselves. Instead, they are putting their longer-term success at risk as well as the future success of their team.

How to build a culture that is safe and where everyone can be vulnerable?

From Brené Brown to perhaps the leading expert on Emotional Intelligence Dr. Daniel Goleman, to motivational speaker and author Simon Sinek to Canadian author focused on transformational leadership, social collaboration, and communication Celine Schillinger, they all agree great leaders create an environment of respect, safety, and curiosity that teams trust.

The power of vulnerability in leadership cannot be overstated. And while this all sounds amazing, you and I have years of pre-programing within our communities / cultures that has told us that vulnerability means weakness. It will take effort for you to unlearn some of our less helpful biases and past lessons and decide to forge a new path that sees vulnerability and showing emotion as strengths and opportunities. It’s time to embrace new ideas and new voices that will create relevant, timely and collaborative solutions that also help us feel engaged and proud.

To build a culture where everyone can be vulnerable, everyone on the team must be certain they are allowed to be creative and to start sentences with the words, “What if we were to…” as they begin to share inspired, improvised, half-baked ideas. Here are a few examples how you can start building a culture of trust.

1. Get to know each other.  You don’t have to become best friends, but start seeing people as more than a j.o.b. Explore what you have in common. Do you have pets, a summer cottage, traveled through Greece? Knowing someone is a good way [not a guaranteed way] to begin trusting someone.

2. Set an example when you are not doing well… when you are struggling. For example, if you are exhausted, frustrated or stressed, it’s fair to send someone else to a meeting on your behalf because you need some down-time. Delegating has the bonus of letting that person know you trust their ability to stand-in for you. Another example is asking for help if you are struggling with a task. In this example you are proving that asking for help is not only OK, but expected. And the bonus here is that it may give a junior employee a feeling of pride to be able to mentor you.

3. If you see someone else feeling vulnerable or attacked, help them! They may not feel they can stand up for themselves so do it for them. This demonstrates you are paying attention and that you care. And the people who see you do this will know it is OK to stand up for someone else as well.

4. Always stand up for the organizational values. As I shared earlier, your organizational values must be respected by all. And everyone in leadership positions must set the example. If leaders ignore shared values, they are telling others it’s OK for them to ignore them as well and that this jeopardizes team alignment, efficiencies and so much more – including perhaps the importance of building / honoring respect and trust.

“Leadership is not about being in charge. It's about taking care of those in your charge.” Simon Sinek

And while leaders must set the intention, it is all of our responsibility to build a trusting, vulnerable, safe workspace. The following are guideline examples for you to consider and expand upon:

1. Cultivate openness where everyone knows that when they share ideas, observations and opinions that they will be heard and valued.

2. Know that it’s unacceptable to not listen to others (and to learn).

3. Never joke, tease or gossip about someone elses expense. Everyone must know there is no risk of being made to feel stupid or embarrassed.

4. Acknowledge that leaders likely have insight into broader goals and have greater decision-making responsibility and therefore may make decisions we don’t fully understand or agree to… but must support.

5. Know our worth is not placed on whether our ideas are accepted.

6. Know that we all make mistakes, and we will use them as an opportunity to learn, not an opportunity to judge, accuse or demonize us.

7. Know that while we share our ideas, we must also know they may not be fully adopted but may spark other ideas.

8. Agree that if we have an idea or suggestion that is out of scope of the immediate topic under discussion that it might be best to arrange a smaller one-on-one meeting with our leader or one of our co-workers and start a discussion there. Staying on-topic during a meeting is also important.

All this to say, you can achieve honest, respectful relationships with your whole team when you agree to how you will treat each other. When team members can be vulnerable with each other, creativity and innovation are enhanced,.

Share Without Oversharing

Privacy and boundaries still exists in a vulnerable culture.

Questions many leaders ask themselves when practicing vulnerability is, “How do I embrace vulnerability without overdoing it and oversharing to the point of making someone uncomfortable — regardless of any positive intentions?”

A team that fully embraces vulnerability must also have an open discussion and shared agreement / recognition that we are all individuals with our own sensitivities and personalities. We must respect that someone may feel uncomfortable or vulnerable even though we don’t. It’s also true that some things are private – not everything about us needs be shared at work. The vulnerability we share at work doesn’t have to be the same vulnerability we share with our family or partner.

My suggestion is that if you are concerned you are oversharing or if you are worried your idea may trigger a sensitivity for someone on your team, this may be the perfect time to share the idea in a closed, one-on-one meeting with your superior. And if you are a leader who has already navigated this, I thank you for having your empathy and edit features turned on. Well done!

One last thing before I close. If you are wondering, “What if Bruce hasn’t done the task he said he would or is not being a team player. Shouldn’t I bring that forward?” To this, I say absolutely – but is that about creativity and a new idea or is that about Bruce putting the team and project in jeopardy? To me it sounds like the latter which suggests it is a conversation you should bring up with your leader or one of your co-workers in a private meeting – Bruce should not be made to feel vulnerable in that situation. Remember, for vulnerability to become a positive in your team it must be supported by trust and respect.

Conclusion

It is time for vulnerability to be part of our workplace culture; to show our emotions to our team and coworkers, our clients and suppliers. In recent years vulnerability for leaders and their teammates of all genders and generations has grown to become culturally acceptable, welcomed and even encouraged. Millennials and Gen Z especially are more comfortable asking for time to manage caregiver and mental health concerns. And lets face it, Millennials and Gen Z are now the dominant populations in our workforce.

If you’ve studied ‘Courageous Leadership’ and have been thinking of it as you read this article, that makes sense to me. Like courageous leadership, being a leader who begins developing a culture of vulnerability often starts with one or two small acts of courage. You can be certain that the best leaders aren’t afraid to be vulnerable. As you evolve down this path, and I imagine from time to time feel outside your comfort zone, I do hope you take pride in the steps you take, how you’ve evolved – grown during the process and how you now know you’ve have supported courageous leadership in your own way.

“Daring leaders work to make sure people can be themselves and feel a sense of belonging.” Brené Brown

When courageous leaders begin to demonstrate vulnerability and trust in their team, something truly special happens. I invite you to build a culture of collaboration, creativity and high employee engagement. 

Leadership is a journey, not a destination.

Thank you for spending time with me today and reading ‘The What, Why and How of Vulnerable Leadership’.

Bruce

Learn More About Bruce Mayhew

Toronto corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting is in the people business… it just so happens that training and/or executive coaching is involved. Let us help you improve your productivity and employee engagement.

To learn more about how leadership training can to improve your skills call us at 416.617.0462.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting's most popular programs are Email Etiquette Training, Difficult Conversations, Generational Differences, Leadership Skills Training and Time Management Training

Related Workshops That Drive Business Success

• What Is Servant Leadership?

• Email Etiquette Training

• The Role of Empathy during Difficult Conversations at Work

• Difficult Conversations: Never Easy - Always Worthwhile

Toronto based corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting proudly offers leadership training and professional development.

Disagree With Respect At Work: Part II

When you and I approach a problem and disagree with respect, it’s an opportunity for us to work as a productive team, to be creative, and build stronger relations as we build trust, loyalty, and pride in our outcomes.

In my previous article called Disagree With Respect At Work: Part I, I discuss three critical building blocks of a culture (at work or at home), where we can safely and respectfully explore different points of view. ‘Rules of Engagement’ is one of the three building blocks I discuss in Part I. With those Rules of Engagement we are able to be part of a culture – a workspace or family – where everyone can trust they will be safe and supported and therefore able to be their whole, honest, true self with all of their passion, creativity and flaws. 

As I wrote in Part I, especially when stakes are high, there is more to having successful, respectful difficult conversations than only those three critical building blocks. So, here is Part II where I share three more that we can all use to help us have successful difficult conversations and be able to disagree with respect at work, with family and even with strangers. These three additional approaches are:

1. Be Intentional About Time and Place

2. Have Conversations In-person, By Phone or By Video

3. Share Stories Instead of Assigning Blame

Lets dive right in.

Be Intentional About Time and Place

Even when we are in a trusting culture there will always be a level of anxiousness when we disagree. Simply by its nature, disagreement makes most of us feel vulnerable. But it’s important we do our best to create a time and place where everyone feels safe, respected and not rushed. Let me share three less than ideal examples:

• It’s not a good time or place to disagree with your boss while they are giving a project update to their boss. Doing this will immediately damage your reputation and destroy trust. This would also signal you are not a team player – and likely a half-dozen other unfavourable characteristics. This may also damage your bosses reputation as a leader.

• It’s not a good time to raise a disagreement with your co-worker when they are working hard to meet a different important end-of-day deadline and they also have to pick up their 6-year-old from daycare before it closes. In this example you are adding a stressful moment when they have to push back on your request and begin negotiating a better time.

• It’s not a good time or place to disagree with your partner in front of your child and their new boyfriend about how late they can stay out.

I bet that even as you read these examples, you felt – actually felt – these were not good times or places. These situations risk unwelcome feelings like surprise, humiliation, frustration, embarrassment, and more. I think we can all imagine many different other times or places for each of these examples where we could have disagreed with respect.

Have Conversations In-person, By Phone Or By Video

It’s near impossible for you and I to feel empathy and caring from an email or text message. In fact, we are more likely to feel the opposite. So, while sending an email or text message may feel ‘safe’ for you, please avoid disagreeing in writing. To disagree with respect I strongly encourage you to try to have these conversations in person… and if not in-person, try to hear each other’s voice. A happy middle-ground is a video conversation where everyone is on-camera (no blank screens). 

This isn’t conjecture. Studies back-up this best-practice. Professor Julia Schroeder at UC Berkley and her colleagues say, “Listening to someone’s voice is humanizing as they make a contradictory or controversial argument. It makes it easier to engage with what that person has to say.” When a person feels empathy or genuine curiosity, it goes a long way to feeling respected.

So, when you disagree, know that a 5-minute face to face conversation can have far greater impact than the email you spend 20, 30 or perhaps even 60-minutes writing. If it is important to have a physical record, go ahead and write a brief email after you have had the in-person, phone or video call.

Share Stories Instead Of Assigning Blame

Facts are important. Stories make a situation real.

We know sharing disagreement in person, by phone or by video call engages our empathy. Sharing stories takes our ability to disagree with respect to a whole other level. Stories also builds connection between people and events which supports greater trust and understanding. Stories also make the situation far more memorable.

To disagree with respect at work, your stories should get to the point quickly. Don’t let your stories drag on. In my Difficult Conversation Training Workshops I encourage participants to consider starting their story by answering ‘Why’ the conversation is important at the beginning before they share ‘What happened’.  Talking about ‘Why’ first does two things. First, it helps the other person (or people) feel safe and want to listen; to not put their defences up. Second, stories help them care and be curious. For example, consider the difference in being on the receiving end of the following two options with the second starting with ‘Why a conversation is important’ and the first and second examples being more inclined to immediately put Tom on the defensive:

1. Bad Example: “Tom, you talk over me in meetings and when you do, this makes me feel undervalued. I want you to stop.”

2. Bad, But Better Example: “Tom, you talk over me in meetings and when you do, this makes me feel undervalued. I want to discuss this with you because I want us to have creative conversations and a respectful work relationship.”

3. Ideal Example: “Tom, I have something important I’d like to share with you because I want us to have creative conversations and a respectful work relationship. When you talk over me in meetings it makes me feel undervalued. I’d like to work with you to find ways we could work together better.”

In the first example, the main goal isn’t to have Tom stop talking over them; it actually feels like the main goal is to assign blame. The second example is better, but still has the chance to immediately trigger Tom into being defensive. The third example has the greatest chance help Tom to stay engaged and curious and trust us (note I said help). If we can help Tom keep his defences down, he’ll be more likely to want to participate in this conversation. Only then can we have a productive, non-threatening conversation.

One last thing about trust. Whether someone trusts us depends on largely on our history with them and others. Are we known to be a good listener who is respectful, patient and curious… or do we have a reputation as a blunt… ‘If you don’t like it, too bad’ type of person?

What If You Are Surprised And Not Expecting It? (BONUS POINT)

The examples I’ve given are all about you and I starting the difficult conversation. But what if you are surprised? Can you still disagree with respect? You may be asking:

• “How do I act when someone comes to me – unexpectedly – to talk about a challenge or disagreement they have?”

• “What do I do when I’m working to a deadline and can’t be interrupted”

• “How can I turn things around when I receive an email that is clearly involves a difference of opinion, disagreement and I feel is both rude and abrupt?

Great questions! I believe everyone deserves the same kindness and respect no matter who you are or what you do. My quick answers to these three questions are:

• If you are feeling surprised and a bit off-balance by a difficult conversation or disagreement then it’s fair to ask for some time to prepare or at least a few moments to gather your thoughts. Even court trials have 15-minute recesses from time to time.

• Unless timing is urgent, if someone approaches you and wants to discuss something, it’s fair to ask to have the conversation at a different time. But, any delay should be short… and reasonable.

• If you feel an email you received is touching on disagreement, I believe it is 100% your best move to try to set up an in-person, video or phone conversation.

Conclusion

You may be thinking that this is all interesting and helpful learning… but what if the other person hasn’t read this article?  Sure, that is a hitch. But I believe this is also an opportunity for you to be a leader and a mentor.

Merriam-Webster defines a mentor as, “1: a trusted counselor or guide. 2: tutor, coach.” With that definition in mind, I bet each of us could think of a dozen people we engage with every day who we subtly or specifically mentor already. Every time we help someone find a solution or share our knowledge / experience we are potentially helping someone grow / learn.

One Last Suggestion

If someone gets upset during a difficult conversation, it’s best you give them some time. They may only need a few minutes, but they may need it to process new information and come to terms with their feelings. If they don’t have time to deal with their feelings, they may not be able to be open to what you are sharing. When they’ve processed their feelings, they will likely have questions and may even need to share their experience.

Disagree with the idea, not the person. Never make a disagreement personal or dismiss the other persons feelings, ideas or beliefs.

Thank you for spending time with me today and reading ‘How To Disagree With Respect At Work: Part II’. I hope you also enjoyed Part I.

Bruce

Learn More About Bruce Mayhew

Toronto corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting is in the people business… it just so happens that training and/or executive coaching is involved. Let us help you improve your productivity and employee engagement.

To learn more about how leadership training can to improve your skills call us at 416.617.0462.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting's most popular programs are Email Etiquette Training, Difficult Conversations, Generational Differences, Leadership Skills Training and Time Management Training

Related Workshops That Drive Business Success

• What Is Servant Leadership?

• Email Etiquette Training

• The Role of Empathy during Difficult Conversations at Work

• Difficult Conversations: Never Easy - Always Worthwhile

Toronto based corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting proudly offers leadership training and professional development.

Work-Life Balance Requires Respect, Trust And Choice By Everyone

Organizations are continuing to struggle finding ways to address the reality that for a company to succeed, employees need to feel like their leaders care about them. This is a struggle because businesses can’t survive if all they do is care for your employees. Instead, the business – employee relationship must be a delicate balance of respect, trust, clear expectations, flexibility, collaboration and choice. 

The question is, "What is the balance between employee needs and business needs?"

Take work-life balance and flexible hours in an office environment as an example. Some employees may work the early part of the day from 7AM to 3PM as their regular hours. Other employees may be on a later schedule from 11AM to 7PM. That is terrific, but what happens when you have to schedule a project meeting and the only time everyone is available is 9:30AM except for the one person whose regular, agreed upon start time is 11AM?

I believe the answer exists within the above mentioned balance of respect, trust, clear expectations, flexibility, collaboration and choice. 

In this example:

• Respect and trust mean that everyone can be confident that there was a serious attempt to find a time during everyone’s typical work hours. They also mean that everyone will respect and trust each other and previous agreements.

• Clear expectations means that everyone knows that if someone can’t make a meeting – no matter what the reason – the person who can’t attend will understand and respect that the meeting must still take place.

• Flexibly, collaboration and choice mean the person who has the conflict has the opportunity – and the responsibility to make one of the following three choices:

1. Choose to make a special adjustment and attend the meeting.

2. Choose to assign an alternate person to represent and speak for them.

3. Choose to be OK receiving the meeting minutes and support any decisions made.

For organizations to succeed they (and by extension the leaders AND every employee), must make each employee feel like their success as employees AND as individuals matters. Employees at every level must feel valued and be proud they are part of the team. This is what it means to build a strong corporate culture where difficult decisions and difficult conversations can actually be prevented.

When people feel valued and proud, they become more creative, more collaborative and more loyal. Nobody should be treated as disposable cogs in a machine that exist only to do their j.o.b. and obey.

One last thing – leadership requires intentionality! As a leader, even if you are not in a leadership position (yet), you must focus on the well-being of others and what you can do to inspire them (and yourself) to greatness. Being a great leader takes conscious effort to find balance between the ever-changing business goals and employee needs… all the time… everyday.

Thank you for reading ‘Work-Life Balance Requires Respect, Trust and Choice By Everyone’. If you have a moment, please let us know, “How do you respect work-life balance?”

Bruce

Learn More About Bruce Mayhew

Toronto corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting is in the people business… it just so happens that training and/or executive coaching is involved. Let us help you improve your productivity and employee engagement.

To learn more about how leadership training can to improve your skills call us at 416.617.0462.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting's most popular programs are Email Etiquette Training, Difficult Conversations, Generational Differences, Leadership Skills Training and Time Management Training

Related Workshops and Posts That Drive Business Success

• What Is A Mission Statement?

• What Is A Vision Statement?

• What Is Servant Leadership?

• Email Etiquette Training

• The Role of Empathy during Difficult Conversations at Work

• Difficult Conversations: Never Easy - Always Worthwhile

Toronto based corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting proudly offers leadership training and professional development.

Difficult Conversations: Never Easy – Always Worthwhile

 Conflict is everywhere and impossible to avoid. And that’s OK,

Even the most confident people don’t see difficult conversations and managing conflict as easy, stress free and certainly not the highlight of their day. But we can all learn how to manage difficult conversations so that we reduce overall stress and improve overall outcomes.

To help us manage difficult conversations I believe it’s important to accept that not all conflict is bad or inherently negative – in fact sharing constructive feedback and resolving conflict often builds stronger relationships, new ideas, greater respect and greater trust.

Imagine you have an employee who isn’t performing or whose behaviour is making work unpleasant for others. I propose it’s better to have a conversation that will be uncomfortable in the short term, but will give the employee the opportunity to see you as someone who cares about their personal and professional future. You are also empowering them to decide if they would like to adjust their behaviour and to continue building a successful career.

And the benefits to having difficult conversations and resolving conflict don’t end with the employee. Consider the benefit to team dynamics and corporate culture when a peaceful resolution is found versus the disruption a more volatile outcome will have for everyone.

First Steps

One of the first steps when having difficult conversations and / or sharing constructive feedback is to be clear how it will benefit us and the other person. In our personal lives, there are times it just isn’t worth it. Do we need to invest in a difficult conversation with a rude salesclerk? Maybe it is worth it… but often it is not. Alternatively, in our professional lives difficult conversations are important for many reasons like when our company values and performance objectives are not being met.

Another important step when having difficult conversations and resolving conflict is to have conversations as soon as possible. When inappropriate behaviour isn’t corrected quickly, it becomes the new norm and far more difficult (and costly) to correct later. Inappropriate behaviour also erodes the motivation, respect, and trust of everyone else on the team who must watch and potentially experience this behaviour first-hand.

Conclusion

There are many other steps to having a difficult conversation and resolving conflict including sharing stories of what you observed, encouraging an atmosphere where situations and solutions are explored versus placing blame, and never thinking the other person is evil / mean. But for now, let’s embrace the idea that conflict and difficult conversations are opportunities for us all to be respectful, improve and build greater trust.

In our next post, (which I will link here) I will discuss important steps to take when faced with conflict and the opportunity to have a respectful, empowering difficult conversations.

Thank you for reading ‘Difficult Conversations: Never Easy - Always Worthwhile’. I will link to other related difficult conversation articles in this series as I launch them.

Bruce

Learn More About Bruce Mayhew

Toronto corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting is in the people business… it just so happens that training and/or executive coaching is involved. Let us help you improve your productivity and employee engagement.

To learn more about how leadership training can to improve your skills call us at 416.617.0462.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting's most popular programs are Email Etiquette Training, Difficult Conversations, Generational Differences, Leadership Skills Training and Time Management Training

Related Workshops That Drive Business Success

• What Is Servant Leadership?

• Email Etiquette Training

• The Role of Empathy during Difficult Conversations at Work

Toronto based corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting offers leadership training and professional development across Canada and the USA.

What Are Core Values?

Welcome to the second in my trilogy of articles covering the importance and use of Vision Statements, Core Values (this article) and Mission Statements.

I like to think of core values as common ground we are all aware of, share, understand and can count on. Core values help unite us – be it families, the companies we work for and purchase from or the non-profit charities we support. Whether it’s connecting leadership to employees, employees to customers, or customers to a feeling of trust, core values bring people, ideas and actions together.

Defining, communicating, and living core values is essential to a company or department reaching its full potential. Yes, you can have a high-functioning department with a great leader and team who embrace shared values within a less-than-ideal company.

If you want a one sentence definition of what are core values, here it is. Core values are a list of action-oriented verbs that clearly and concisely represents the company’s guiding principles.

A company’s core values establish guidance for company leadership and employees. Core values help companies make important decisions and keep everyone on the team focused and accountable, particularly during time or challenge or change or when faced with difficult decisions. Core values are also a useful tool for recruitment. Similarly, core values are excellent tools to help improve customer awareness and confidence. When customers understand the business’s core values and see how they align with their own, they’ll more than likely trust the company.

How to Use Core Values

Before you publish the core values, determine how they will be used. How will the company help every employee begin living these values with every discussion they have, meeting they participate in and decision they make? How will these values be used in product design, implementation, marketing materials, sales discussion, and client support? When will they be used to say “Yes” and most importantly, when will they be used to say “No” or “I made a mistake.” How will these amazing new core values be integrated into every employee’s goal setting discussion and performance reviews – from the most senior to the most junior? Hold everyone accountable for living your core values – no exceptions.

Share them everywhere and all the time. What else is there to say? Implementation of your core values must be more than putting up posters in the conference rooms and updating them on your website. If that is all you do, you many as well not have done any of this work.

Finally, integrate them into your vision statement (your future looking document) and your mission statement (your what we are doing today document).

How to Build Core Values

Uncovering your core values is an important project that provides stability and guidance throughout the company. Consider these steps when planning how to find your company’s unique set of core values.

1. Assemble a Team

   As with the exercise to uncover your vision statement, assemble a team who will share in this project. Ideally, include people from different levels of the organization. An outside agency will be a great asset as they can be a neutral voice and help guide the process.

2. Brainstorm values

   In a small business you may be able to ask everyone for their insight. In a larger operation, you may need to be more selective as you capture a range of employee voices from different levels of the company. Ask employees to use verbs – action words and short statements to describe how they feel about the company, the work they do and the impact they make. Also ask what they would like to company to represent in the future. Don’t edit their feedback. You will likely end up with a long list of interesting ideas. Note, some of this feedback may not be positive or inspirational. That is valuable information into your corporate culture, and I encourage you to use it to work on your employee engagement.

3. Group themes

   Now is the time to consolidate and group similar words and statements. Look for themes that represent your business now. I also encourage you to explore themes that are inspirational and will assist in supporting change and growth.

4. Look for words that pop

   Have each person on your values team independently select 10 words they feel best meets the company’s current and future potential and uniqueness. Ask them to rate from highest to lowest and include a brief explanation of why they chose that word. Then, assemble the team and discuss. This is a time to practice your listening skills. Try to choose six core words which may have a few related words listed below them. If you have more than six core words don’t worry – go with that for now. Remember, you are looking for unique, relevant and truthful words that are inspirational for today and into the future.  

5. Draft a support statement for each word

   Try writing one sentence for each of the six word you chose in the previous step. You may want to ask each member of your team to draft a few versions of this sentence and then meet to review and discuss each option. Once you have agreed on a sentence for each word, ask questions like, “Are we missing anything?” and “Do we really believe them?”

6. Finalize core values

   Share your proposed core values with others from top leadership to your newest employee. How do they feel about them? What feedback do they have about them? Use their feedback and see if there must be any further adjustment before you lock down your final core values and support statements.

Conclusion

I recently was approached by a prospect to do some leadership training. As part of our initial discussion we began to talk about their vision statement and their core values which they were proud of for good reason, they had recently invested a good amount of time to update them as part of their current and future strategy. To honour their hard work and the hard work of other teams who want to embark on this journey, I decided to write a trilogy of articles that walks through the important process of creating and using:

• A Vision Statement

• Company Core Values (this article)

• A Mission Statement

I will link to the other two articles here as I launch them.

For now, let me leave you with one last thought about core values. Exploring, sharing and working each day being guided by your companies core values will help everyone as individuals achieve excellence as they work united toward the companies – and their own personal and professional goals.

Thank you for reading ‘What Are Core Values?’.

Be well and happy communicating, leading and creating a culture of belonging within your company or within your team.

Bruce

Learn More About Bruce Mayhew

Toronto corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting is in the people business… it just so happens that training and/or executive coaching is involved. Let us help you improve your productivity and employee engagement.

To learn more about how leadership training can to improve your skills call us at 416.617.0462.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting's most popular programs are Email Etiquette Training, Difficult Conversations, Generational Differences, Leadership Skills Training and Time Management Training

Related Workshops That Drive Business Success

• What Is Servant Leadership?

• Email Etiquette Training

• Having Difficult Conversations

• The Role of Empathy during Difficult Conversations at Work

Toronto based corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting offers leadership training and professional development across Canada and the USA.

Honouring Our Values: Letting Values Be Our Guide During Adversity

Our values draw us toward people we admire and love. They guide our everyday choices and instinctively inform us to what is right and wrong behaviour. Our values are also our superpower when we encounter difficult situations and adversity. When we are challenged, our values help us make difficult decisions, reconciling what we should and should not do (or say and should not say), especially if there is a ‘price’ to pay for our action or inaction.

This article is an exploration of how we can ease our journey through adversity by understanding how our values can help us in a very conscious way.

Step 1. Know Our Personal and Professional Values and What They Mean To Us

Most of us don’t pay attention to our values, and that is OK. When nothing unusual is happening our values sit in the background, like software running on our computer always doing something. But there is still great benefit in taking time to get to know our personal and professional values and what they mean to us.

When we have explored what our values are and what they mean to us, we can use them to make the right decisions quickly and confidently… especially when we have to make difficult or challenging decisions. Knowing our values allows us to confidently stand for what we believe in and to show ourselves respect. This ability to make good decisions quickly also becomes part of our reputation, we become known for our quick, thoughtful, and reliable decision making.

Step 2. Consciously Use Our Values To Explore Challenging Situations

When we feel worried, confused, vulnerable or even threatened, what do we do? We have only two choices. React or Respond. 

When our emotions get triggered you and I react, and risk making less than ideal decisions. When we react our actions are based on instinct and have very little to no analytical engagement. Questions like “Why is this happening?”, “What is most important to me?, and “What are my options,” have a slim chance of being evaluated. We need to accept that when our values are challenged we often will feel uncomfortable, vulnerable and even defensive. But, it doesn’t have to be this way when we spend some time getting to know our values in advance.

We can respond with confidence and clarity of mind when we consciously, purposefully use our values to guide our decisions and actions. When we respond versus react, our values help us understand what is going on, what we are feeling and help us decide what we want to do next. We can evaluate what is important to us, the pros and cons of our actions and confidently be responsible for our decisions. All this may take only a fraction of a second or it may take some time… but it happens.

And, perhaps most important of all, knowing our values allow us to keep from forcing our values and our beliefs on others. I don’t believe our values should ever impact other people’s rights to express their values and beliefs. Challenging situations not only allow us to patiently evaluate a situation, they also allow us to evaluate our values, what they say about us and if this may be a time for us and/or our values to evolve.

Step 3. Use Our Values To Embrace Change and Growth

When we use our values to explore new ideas (or new values) and to consciously decide how we want to respond, means we are also giving ourselves a gift… we are giving ourselves an opportunity to learn, grow and change for the better every single time in a thoughtful, intentional way. Even the experience you are having at this moment by reading this article means you are intentionally using your values (like curiosity). And, even if you disagree with some or all of what I am sharing, the simple act of being thoughtful and evaluating a topic often translates to personal evolution and growth. I love this!

Unfortunately, fear sometimes prevents us from our instinct to grow. Instead of trying something new we go with what we know – what we think is safe but is actually holding us back. For example, how often do you order something completely different at a restaurant… or even choose to go to a new restaurant? I get it… the unknown can be scary and unpredictable. But look on the bright side, what new flavours, tastes and even company are you missing? What new favourite foods and friends might be out there so far… unexplored?

At work we have to accept that in today’s fast paced, highly technical, global market we can’t be expected to know everything. Even the smartest people and the best leaders don’t have all the answers. So, whether it is our personal lives, or our professional lives, we need to try to let our main values be ‘Growth Through Curiosity’ at least some of the time. We can learn to let our fear inform us and even empower us. Recognize that our fear is just letting us know there are new people and/or new information we have not yet had a chance to consider.

Conclusion

Get to know our values and how they can help us and the people around us in so many ways. Our values give us clarity and confidence, because getting to know our values allows us to get to know ourselves better.

Thank you for reading ‘Honouring Our Values: Letting Values Be Our Guide During Adversity’.

Be well and happy communicating, leading and creating a culture of belonging within your company or within your team.

Bruce

Learn More About Bruce Mayhew

Toronto corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting is in the people business… it just so happens that training and/or executive coaching is involved. Let us help you improve your productivity and employee engagement.

To learn more about how leadership training can to improve your skills call us at 416.617.0462.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting's most popular programs are Email Etiquette Training, Difficult Conversations, Generational Differences, Leadership Skills Training and Time Management Training

Related Workshops That Drive Business Success

• What Is Servant Leadership?

• Email Etiquette Training

• Having Difficult Conversations

• The Role of Empathy during Difficult Conversations at Work

Toronto based corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting offers leadership training and professional development across Canada and the USA.

What Is Servant Leadership?

This article explores the question “What is servant leadership?” and some recommendations for leaders who want to become great servant leaders.

Servant Leadership as a formal leadership approach has been around since the 1970’s. The positive impact a leader who follows the servant leadership approach has is impressive. It is widely accepted that employees who are supported by a leader who embraces the servant leadership model feel more engaged and purpose driven. In short, employees have greater trust in their leader and as such feel a greater sense of ownership, impact and creativity for their work and often the organization. All of this leads to employees who are more loyal and therefore turnover costs and loss of institutional knowledge decreases. 

I have to say I am not fond of the phrase ‘servant’, instinctively it is a negative trigger word for me and may be for you as well. And yes, I know that in this context it is meant as positive – to intentionally and willingly support others so they can be the best they can be. I liken this to how a parent chooses to put their children’s needs before their own so their children can grow and become the best they can be. Still, I wish that Robert K. Greenleaf who initially coined the name ‘Servant Leadership’ would have found another name.

I think it is important to lay a foundation and share my belief that every one of us can be called on to be a leader, no matter what our official title may be. For example, if people look to you for your expertise during a meeting, you are likely being a subject matter expert and leader in that moment. Therefore, anyone can follow the servant leadership model in their day-to-day work. Let me also share my belief that while an organization may not embrace a servant leadership culture, an individual can still develop a culture within their own department / bubble that embraces qualities of service leadership.

What Is The Difference Between Servant Leadership And Traditional Leadership?

A popular question is “What is the difference between servant leadership and traditional leadership?”

Servant leadership occurs when a leader sees the support and growth of their people (including their personal and professional health and development) as their main responsibility; basically, people come first. The main focus of a servant leader is to support the company’s employees and to provide them with the resources, information, flexibility, training and coaching they need (see my 11 Principles below), so they will be inspired and committed to working together to reach the company goals and market success. Service leadership is about empowering people as a valuable asset and enriching them in order to reach defined company goals.

Traditional Leadership focuses more on hierarchy and a high degree of guidance and influence in what employees do, how they do it and when; basically, company comes first. Following a pre-established process is typical in a traditional leadership model. Employees are given very little decision-making opportunity or autonomy. This ‘distance’ and lack of personal control means employees often feel very little ownership and commitment to their work or the company. The main focus of a traditional leader is to reach the company goals and market success in any way possible using people (to varying degrees) as a necessary resource.

Being A Servant Leader in 2022

Successful leaders in 2022 must accept they don’t have all the answers. New technology, new ways to work, new market conditions, new employee needs and new client needs are constantly shifting our world. Servant leaders embrace this and see this insight as a positive… a superpower that their competition may not (and often do not) have.

Servant leaders empower and inspire their employees to bring their whole self and unique expertise to each task. To do this servant leaders invest time to get to know the people around them. Servant leaders get to know people’s skills, what inspires them, how they communicate, their goals and opportunities for growth. Servant leaders learn how to help others succeed.

The same way a servant leader helps their employees develop new skills and be their best in their personal and professional lives, servant leaders also embrace growth in their own personal and professional lives; they serve as a living example for their team. In 2022, I believe one of the most important attributes of a successful leader is knowing that being a leader is a privilege and must be seen as a constant journey, a never-ending opportunity for each of us to invest in ourselves. There will always be strengths a great leader will have to learn, be reminded of and even re-learn. The moment a leader feels comfortable is the moment they will be losing their advantage.

Bruce Mayhew’s 11 Principles of a Powerful Servant Leader

As I mentioned above, I’m not thrilled about the term ‘Servant Leadership’ so for now I’m going to call these principles my ‘11 Principles of Service Leadership’. In one way of another, many of the people I work with ask me, “What do I have to do to be a great leader?” To be a leader no matter what your title says you are, you have to be committed to a life of learning about and practicing all of the following 11 principles.

1. Acceptance that leadership is a never-ending journey

2. Self-aware (Our Strengths, How We Act, Our Impact on Others)

3. Humanity (Values, Individuality, Empathy / Compassion)

4. Earn Trust (Faith, Confidence, Reliance / Commitment)

5. Vision (Dreamer, Prophet, Communicate Strategic Direction)

6. Transparent (Vision is shared, ‘Why’ is shared, Measurements of Success shared)

7. Foster Inclusivity (A trusted method for Input, Belonging, Diversity, Respect)

8. Be a Gardener to Individuals and Teams (Coach, Inspire, Ownership / Responsibility, Develop Others, Let others fail /learn, Support / Reward, Collaboration / Community)

9. Patience (Stamina, Serenity, A Listener)

10. Competence (Capability, Skill, Experience)

11. Character (Charm, Charisma, A Healer)

Conclusion

A servant leader sees beyond the company goals and ROI and instead actively seeks to develop and empower each employee and to align each employees’ goals and need with the goals and needs of the company.

I encourage you to explore how you can position your employees first and how you can align their goals with the goals of the company. On your own leadership journey, explore how self-aware you are and the trust you may or may not be developing as you support and communicate with others. And don’t forget to invest in yourself. Being a great leader is rarely a natural skill and learning how to be a great leader is not easy and doesn’t happen overnight. If you need help, find a mentor and a coach (I said and, not or) to help you become a better leader.

Thank you for reading “What Is Servant Leadership?”. I look forward to your thoughts, comments, stories.

Learn More About Our Leadership Training

Toronto corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting is in the people business… it just so happens that training and/or executive coaching is involved. Let us help you improve your productivity and employee engagement.

To learn more about how leadership training can to improve your skills call us at 416.617.0462.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting's most popular programs are Email Etiquette Training, Difficult Conversations, Generational Differences, Leadership Skills Training and Time Management Training

Related Workshops That Drive Business Success

• Email Etiquette Training

• Having Difficult Conversations

• Developing Business Stories

Toronto based corporate trainer and executive coach Bruce Mayhew Consulting offers leadership training and professional development across Canada and the USA.

Empathy at Work During the Covid Pandemic and Moving Forward

An exploration of empathy is an important opportunity as we all push through the Covid-19 pandemic. Learning what other people may be feeling, believing and/or needing during this difficult time helps us learn about ourselves and what is important to us. Practicing empathy also helps us be strong, recover and even emerge out of a bad experience with greater awareness and resilience. It helps us be the people we want to be and build the future we deserve.

We can all agree the Covid pandemic has us under greater stress. If we’ve been able to continue working during the pandemic we’ve likely either separated from others with plexiglass and masks (as important as they are), or we’ve fallen into a pattern of back-to-back, highly efficient Zoom calls and even more email than ever. Covid also has added stress to our family lives, sometimes keeping family members apart while keeping others together 24/7 for weeks and even months on end. Even grocery shopping and other simple tasks has become complicated. And, worst of all, Covid has taken friends and loved ones away from many of us.

At this stage of the pandemic most of us are exhausted, less connected and are quite simply out of practice at how to be social and build personal connections, both of which help us have trusting, respectful and mutually beneficial relationships.

Finding the silver lining

We can give our shared distress some meaning. Nelson Mandela said, “Everyone can rise above their circumstances and achieve success if they are dedicated to and passionate about what they do.” As we rebuild, we have an opportunity to reflect on what we are learning about ourselves, our communities and our workspaces. We also get to decide how we want to move forward as we celebrate our strength and resilience.

Even though we may not be fully out of the Covid pandemic, let’s not wait to take a positive next step.

In our workspaces each of us (from the brand new employee to the veteran leader) have an opportunity to champion healthy workspaces and build healthy teams and healthy companies. All of us can take on a leadership role to create empathetic workspaces built upon shared respect and trust… even if it is within our own bubble, one positive step will lead to another and will influence someone else. Another Nelson Mandela quote seems appropriate here, “As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same”.

Opportunities to practice empathy and the benefits

Empathy is at our fingertips, all we have to do is choose to use it. And best of all, it is free of charge and very effective.

Here are 6 of my favourite opportunities to practice empathy:

1. Explore our personal and shared values… and what they mean

2. Be open to learn about each other and from each other (I love hearing other peoples stories)

3. Strive to develop greater team communication and inclusion

4. Support greater collaboration, commitment, creativity and innovation

5. Support greater work life balance

6. Be very open to continuous change (all of these opportunities will require an element of change)

By following the above mentioned opportunities to practice empathy, in addition to greater workplace harmony we all can experience the following Win-Win benefits for ourselves, our friends/coworkers and our company (I think this is amazing, especially since empathy costs nothing):

• Less burnout

• Greater satisfaction, pride and sense of purpose in our work (for us and for others)

• Greater productivity

• Lower turnover

• Greater customer experiences and customer satisfaction

Using empathy at work and other places

Empathy is at the heart of feeling respect for ourselves and others. When we feel respected it meets our individual need to feel valued for our contribution. There are so many ways to explore empathy both within ourselves and outwardly as we all push through the Covid-19 pandemic. In addition to the 6 opportunities to practice empathy during the covid pandemic and moving forward that I mentioned above, here are 5 more described in a bit more detail.

• Make a conscious effort to use empathy to rebuild trusting and respectful relationships. Show the people you work with that you care about them by learning about them and listening to their stories with no judgement. And, if they have a challenge, don’t jump into solutions mode. Instead, pause and listen; be understanding. That might be all they need.

• Every once in a while, call a friend, family member or business connection to just to say hi – especially if you don’t need anything from them. Take a moment to sincerely ask how they are. This shows them you care about them as individuals.

• Be respectful, especially if their preferences and beliefs are different than your own. There are two types of respect that build trusting relationships; Earned Respect and Owed Respect.

  • Owed Respect is based on a sense of equally and everyone should experience it. If it is lacking there is often micromanaging, abuse of power, dismissiveness, passive aggressive behaviour.

  • Earned Respect is based on our individual accomplishments or qualities. We are recognized for our expertise and given opportunity to contribute and perhaps even lead when we are the subject matter expert. If it is lacking, we feel interchangeable and don’t get credit for our unique contribution and/or ideas.

• Be open to the idea that compromise is a source of strength, not weakness. Finding a shared solution does mean we learn about each others needs and therefore often take a bit more time. In workspaces shared solutions are often more impactful and more creative. And, because shared solutions are supported by multiple people and/or departments, respect, commitment and collaboration also increase… all because of compromise.

• Volunteer somewhere. Studies show that when we help other people we trigger our mesolimbic system, the part of our brain that is responsible for feelings of reward, pride and an increase in self-esteem. Volunteering also provides us opportunities to be in low stress situations, to do something good and to be around other like-minded people. All of this means we are able to practice our communication skills, build good bonds with new ‘friends’ and build even stronger bonds with existing friends and family. Overall, another Win-Win.

Conclusion

This is just a snapshot of how empathy provides a life-long opportunity to grow and become a better version of ourselves. As we emerge out of the Covid-19 pandemic we all have the opportunity to do so with greater awareness of who we want to be, how we want to act and who we want to be with and work with. All we have to do is begin to explore our potential.

Now more than ever lets remember to practice patience with ourselves and others and take this moment to explore how we have practiced empathy in the past and how we can ratchet it up a notch or two moving forward.

Thank you for reading about how to move forward as we all push through the Covid-19 pandemic.

Bruce

Other articles in this series include:

• The Importance of Empathy at Work

• How to Practice Empathy at Work

• 8 Habits of Highly Empathic People

• The Role of Empathy During Difficult Conversations at Work

About Bruce and Bruce Mayhew Consulting.

Bruce is Corporate Trainer, Keynote Speaker and Executive Coach.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting specializes in customized Difficult Conversations, Crucial Conversations or Conflict Management Training, Email Etiquette Training, Leadership & New Leadership Development, Generational Differences, Time Management Training and other soft skills training solutions in Toronto and across Canada. Bruce is also an Executive Coach to a few select clients.

Bruce is an experienced motivational speaker in Toronto and has inspired audiences across Canada and within the USA and the UK. Bruce works hard to always make sure your training event, conference, retreat, or annual general meeting is a success.

How To Eliminate Rude, Bossy & Passive Aggressive Email Tone

Most of us don’t mean to write rude, bossy and passive aggressive email, but it happens.

Thankfully there are easy ways to eliminate rude, bossy and passive aggressive email tone and instead use our email and text messages to build high-quality and highly productive relationships.

Tone is one of the most important parts of our email or text messages. Why? Because tone influences what our readers understand and how they feel about us. Our tone also influences our readers motivation to do what we are asking. We choose to be respectful, thoughtful and considerate… or not.

We often don’t take a moment to consider if we are writing rude, bossy and passive aggressive email and text message. Unfortunately, by not investing those few seconds, the compounding impact of all of our messages likely is having a negative impact on our personal and professional reputation not to mention increased stress and even lower productivity for everyone.

We choose the type of relationships we have

There are two kinds of relationships we choose have with others. We choose to have trusting, respectful, thoughtful and mutually beneficial relationships, or we choose to build frustrating, rude and stressful relationships.

Respect, appreciation and being treated with kindness are important building blocks of loyal work relationships. You know from your own experience that when you feel respected and appreciated you will usually make sure you do your very best, go the extra mile and even go our of your way to work with that other person. Alternatively, when we feel disrespected, even the most capable and creative of us will often deliver a ‘Meets Expectations’ performance and have a ‘Do what I’m asked – nothing more’ attitude. For this reason (and others), a bossy or aggressive writer doesn’t only cause stress and frustration for others when they write disrespectful, rude and/or passive aggressive messages; they also create stress and frustration for themselves.

So, how can you keep your messages from sounding rude, bossy, self-important, disrespectful and passive aggressive?

1.     Be polite.

People deserve to feel respected even if they are getting a paycheque. I don’t mean waste time with lots of social niceties. In fact, getting to the point is critical and something everyone prefers.

Being polite and respectful is one of the top values people say they appreciate in others. So, this means use words like Hi, Hello, Please and Thank You. It’s natural and polite to walk into someone’s office or call them on the phone and say, “Hi Bruce”. So why not when we email?

For example, if you were to receive the following message – especially if it was unexpected, you could easily interpret it as rude, bossy and disrespectful.

“What is the pricing on the XYZ account and when is the renewal date?”

This next version isn’t perfect, but it does sound less aggressive, more polite and more respectful… just by saying Hi, using their name and saying thanks.

“Hi Jessy,

What is the pricing on the XYZ account and when is the renewal date?

Thanks”

The one variation on this rule is if you and I write to each-other all day long. In this case, as long as you and I have talked – literally talked and agree that saying “Hi” and “thanks, isn’t necessary, then it is OK to drop it (but it may still be nice to add ‘Hi Bruce, hope you had a great weekend” at the end of our first email on a Monday morning).

2.     Manage other peoples expectations… and our own expectations.

There is nothing worse than interrupting what you are doing or rescheduling a meet because your boss sent you what sounds like an urgent request, only to find out when you deliver it that they didn’t need it for a day or two… or three. It often leaves us feeling manipulated and that our bosses don’t respect us and the time we dedicate to scheduling our commitments.

The solution is to be crystal clear and always include:

• What you need (likely you already do this)

• When you need it (helps others prioritize their schedule)

• Why you need it (helps others prioritize and often helps them determine how to format what they send to you)

• What you understand (helps everyone be clear about what each of us understand)

• What you will do (helps us not duplicate work… or worse yet miss something that needs to be done)

Using the example from point #1, the following is an even better way to build trusting, respectful, mutually beneficial relationships within a short message while we also manage other peoples expectations… and our own.

“Hi Jessy,

Please let me know by 10AM tomorrow the pricing on the XYZ account and when the renewal date is so I can include it in the proposal that is due at noon. If you need additional resources please let me know.

Thanks.”

The added benefit of the approach of this short, two-sentence email is that besides being polite, it tells Jessy what you need, when you need it and why it is important you get it by 10AM. It clearly manages Jessy’s expectations and your own. And, while you could eliminate the second sentence and still be OK, I do like it because it gives Jessy some control because it provides an opportunity to let you know if they need additional support. 

3.     Let someone know when they did a good job.

Again, you may be emailing or texting someone you pay, but everyone wants to know the work they are doing is important and they made a difference. So consider adding a line like “Those are exactly the numbers I needed.” Or “That presentation deck looks great”.

Be assured I am not recommending we praise others every time they do something, but every once in a while I urge you to recognize their work. Your 5-second investment from time to time will create positive energy and goodwill that cannot be measured.   

4.     Remember you are writing to someone else.

Most of us write as if we are writing to ourselves – with our own priorities, needs and experience but even if we are working in the same department it is likely that our priorities are different.

Example 1. Your priority may be to get a marketing forecast out by end of week, while mine is to balance my advertising spend for one of our biggest clients.

Example 2. You may have lots of industry experience and knowledge while I may be new or from a different department so don’t understand all that is involved and who to include when you ask for a ‘Agile Project Forecast’.

Example 3. Your ‘quick question’ may not have a ‘quick answer’. You may think the answer is simple, but I need to organize input from three different departments to get you the answer.

So when you are writing to someone else always try to be aware of the other peoples experience, understanding of industry language and priorities. And as I mentioned above, be sure to consider manage expectations as outlined in point 2 including providing others an opportunity to ask questions or give you feedback.

5.     Keep from sounding passive aggressive.

So far we’ve talked a lot about tone, so now lets focus in on passive aggressive messages.

I have a relative who is the queen of passive aggressive. She always seems to have an alternative motive or double meaning. The sad part is even when she isn’t being passive aggressive the rest of the family are wondering “What does she really mean?” or “What does she really want?” That is not the reputation you want to build for yourself.

Sounding passive aggressive is a bit habit forming; some people do it without even realizing it. And, expecting certain people to be passive aggressive is also habit forming. For example, if I expect you to be passive aggressive – or even rude or bossy, unless you are really careful I will always interpret your messages that way. Fortunately, people can unlearn bad habits and can rebuild their reputation.

The best way to avoid sounding passive aggressive is to re-read your messages. Ask yourself, if you were to receive it, would you be taken back? If you have the slightest feeling it is, rewrite.

That said, here are a few of my favourite passive aggressive approaches to avoid.

A: Stop asking the same question over and over. Just because you want a different answer, asking me again and again isn’t going to change reality.

B: “As per my last email”. You can hear the writers’ attitude. Perhaps it is frustration in repeating themselves over and over… or perhaps they are angry about something and someone else… but if you write it, know it will likely negatively impact your relationship with that person and perhaps others who see that email.

C: “No doubt you are aware”. This is about as blatantly passive aggressive as you can get. If someone missed something it’s right to bring their attention to it but, you don’t have to be insulting – even if they did overlook it on purpose. Remember, other people may read your message at some point and not know the whole story.

D: “For future reference” can be interpreted in many ways. Often, it means “don’t bother me again when the solution is obvious if you gave it a second of thought or did your job.” It’s worth noting that what is obvious to you may not be to me. I may be in another department, new, under extremely tight deadlines or perhaps my boss is asking me to send this and I really wish I didn’t have to. So next time – do your own reputation a favour and leave out these three words. “Here is where you will find files on this topic,” is much more friendly than “For future reference, here is where you will find files on this topic,”.

E: “Thanks in advance” is one of my least favourite statements. For the few times I receive it, it is usually followed by a request that is not my responsibility, the bottom of my priority list or junk email.

6.     When you ask for a meeting, be prompt with the start and stop time.

I know this doesn’t have anything to do with tone in writing; unfortunately running over timelines happens all too often, causing major frustration with employees, coworkers and suppliers. It is also passive aggressive behaviour so I thought I would include it.

Nowadays many of us have back to back online meetings using Zoom or Microsoft Teams. We go directly from one meeting to another with no break. Showing respect for others means we start meetings on time. It also means we end meetings on time… or early (imagine that). If we are a meeting organizer or presenter and force 10 coworkers and other department heads to wait for us because we are 5-minutes late, that means we just cost our company 50-minutes of productivity. If this happens routinely we build a reputation as selfish, entitled, disorganized and even unaware of how hard others are working.

Key time management and reputation saving tip is to start meetings on time and be sure to cover the critical elements first. Then, if there is time go ahead and discuss topics that are not part of the agenda and meeting purpose. Too often the reverse is done and the real meeting agenda is squeezed into the last 10-minutes and we find we are late for our next meeting.

Whether you make $30,000 or $300,000 respect the people you work with and yourself.

Conclusion:

Turning the table for a moment, when you receive a rude, bossy and passive aggressive email or text message, there is always a way to reply and not join their club. Unfortunately, when we respond using passive aggressive phrases, that will reflect back on us. Remember, it’s all about your brand and your reputation; if someone is being ridiculous, foolish or unprofessional that is all about them and their reputation. And, when we keep ourselves under control and professional – especially at those times – people will notice… and that is a good thing for us.

For everyone else, it’s always important to remember that tone is always one of the most important parts of our email or text messages. The examples I’ve shared here are some of the most effective ways to eliminate rude, bossy and passive aggressive email tone from our messages and instead use our email and text messages to build trusting, respectful, mutually beneficial relationships.

So, as you move forward writing email and text messages I hope you routinely take a moment to consider how others will interpret your messages. The few seconds you spend getting into the habit of writing great messages will save you countless time and help you build a personal and professional reputation you can be proud of.

Thank you for reading about how to eliminate rude, bossy and passive aggressive email tone from your writing.

Bruce

About Bruce and Bruce Mayhew Consulting.

Bruce is Corporate Trainer, Keynote Speaker and Executive Coach.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting specializes in customized Difficult Conversations, Crucial Conversations or Conflict Management Training, Email Etiquette Training, Leadership & New Leadership Development, Generational Differences, Time Management Training and other soft skills training solutions in Toronto and across Canada. Bruce is also an Executive Coach to a few select clients.

Bruce is an experienced motivational speaker in Toronto and has inspired audiences across Canada and within the USA and the UK. Bruce works hard to always make sure your training event, conference, retreat, or annual general meeting is a success.

The Importance Of Building A Supportive Company Culture

A supportive company culture is a living, breathing, dynamic space. It is an environment where ideas, responsibilities, respect and mutual support ebb and flow between leaders, employees, suppliers, clients and more. It is a place where trust and loyalty are nurtured carefully. And all supportive corporate cultures are built on a foundation of purpose; a shared understanding of the company vision, mission and values. Metaphorically speaking, purpose is where you are going, and corporate culture is how you are getting there.

Everyone from the most junior employee to the most senior has a responsibility to support the company culture; it is not the sole responsibility of the leadership team, HR or the social committee. A healthy, supportive corporate culture is a symbiotic relationship that involves everyone. It grows out of the big and small decisions we make, how we act, what we say, how we say it, how we treat each other and what part we play in our community. We are all ambassadors of our corporate culture as well as our own personal and professional reputation (brand).

The following are opportunities where each of us can contribute to a supportive company culture. And, while all of these are great opportunities, we must recognize it would be impossible to ever develop a complete list. So, I encourage you to consider these suggestions but to also consider what other ways you and/or your company could use to create a supportive company culture.

Company Examples: Adding to a supportive company culture:

Companies with supportive company cultures know most employees want to be proud of where they work and want to help the company be the best it can be. Yes, there will always be an employee who doesn’t care and only wants a paycheck, but truthfully, there are far fewer people like this than we may think. Most people who have checked-out simply don’t feel valued, respected and supported (3 from a list of most common reasons), but put them in a space where the corporate culture is rich and they will thrive.

To help proud employees do their best work, the following are examples how great leaders add to a supportive company culture:

1. ·      Offer employees fair wages with respectful benefits

2. ·      Strive to be sure employees feel:

   • Valued

   • Appreciated

   • Trusted

   • Involved

   • Empowered

3. ·      Encourage employees to ask questions

4. ·      Employees believe they contribute / their work is important

5. ·      Employees feel a level of control / Autonomy

6. ·      Provide employees opportunities to better themselves

7. ·      Empower employees to work when they are at their best

8. ·      Employees are:

   • Mentored

   • Challenged

   • Promoted

   • Encouraged to enjoy interests outside of work

9. ·       Be a good corporate citizen

Leadership Examples: Adding to a supportive company culture:

While it is everyone’s responsibility to build and support the company culture, leaders really do play an important role in what happens throughout the company and/or within their team. Even a leader within a company with a questionable company culture can create a happy, creative, productive and loyal corporate micro-culture when their team feels their respect and trust.

So, what can a leader do within their company and/or team to develop a supportive corporate culture?

1. Include everyone on your team to define team values and/or to discuss what the current team or organization values impact them and how they approach their work. Note: Even though your company may have defined values, I don’t think there is anything wrong with sitting with your team to not only review them… but to add one or two that your team may want to also adopt.

2. Explore openly with your team how every decision and/or action supports (or does not support) the company’s core values, beliefs, mission and vision.

3. Be approachable

4. Practice empathy

5. Be crystal clear with your expectations

6. Agree that no question is a bad question. Better people ask for clarification than do something unexpected eh?

7. Demonstrate trust by giving employees the opportunity to figure things out for themselves. This often develops a greater sense of responsibility, pride and confidence in the employees (or teams) and makes their work important to them. 

8. Demonstrate you value suggestions from employees and suppliers as much as you do from other leaders.

9. Provide employees and teams the autonomy and decision-making ability they need to be accountable. Leaders need to support their team while also helping them be responsible and accountable for their work. Accountability develops greater sense of responsibility, pride and confidence. It will help them grow and be better at their work in the future. Remember, leaders do not make every decision; they trust employees who are experts and/or closer to the work.

10. Reward when people and/or teams are accountable. 

11. Encourage and praise employees who collaborate well with others. This doesn’t mean only reward extraverts; introverts are often some of the best collaborators.  

12. Take onboarding new employees seriously, help them learn the language, the culture and the organization. Consider matching new employees with internal mentors.

13. Help your company and team be a good corporate citizen.

14. Respect our environment.

Employee Examples: Adding to a supportive company culture:

During my career I have had some great bosses – I’ve also had one really bad boss. This bad boss created a terrible team culture even though the overall corporate culture was quite good. Thankfully, there were a few of us on the team who banded together to support each other and to find ways to do our best work within the toxic storm our leader created.

Ways in which employees can add to a supportive company (or team) culture include:

1. Know what the company’s core values, beliefs, mission and vision are. Try to use those as goal posts for the decisions you make.

2. Demonstrate you recognize everyone has a voice and their ideas are valued.

3. Always enjoy a good laugh, but never at someone else’s expense. Mutual respect is critical.

4. When you are wrong or makes an error, admit it and move on. Being accountable shows respect for yourself and your colleagues. A culture of accountability also develops trust.

5. When someone else is wrong or makes an error, move on. Ask them if they would like your support to find ways to minimize / correct the damage. 

6. When someone else has a better idea, give them credit and help them / the team develop it further. Be an example of integrity, honour and respect of other people and ideas.

7. Be respectful with your language.

8. Help your company and team be a good corporate citizen.

9. Respect our environment.

Toxic workplaces cause psychological and physical stress. This engages peoples natural instinct to protect themselves, to not share creative ideas, decreases motivation, increases absenteeism and eventually turnover.

Organizations are aways in competition to hire and retain amazing people. The best way to protect themselves from losing valuable employees is to make sure you have a supportive company culture that makes your employees… and your competitions employees… want to work for you.

Conclusion

You now have many examples how to create a supportive company culture that is an environment for growth, hard work and change while still maintaining a low stress environment. This creates one of the best places to work where productivity and loyalty are high while conflict and turnover are low. When we have a great company culture, employees trust each other and can be their true authentic self. When we trust and respect each other we share good ideas, crazy ideas, we look out for each other and everyone wins. 

BONUS:

Two deeper dives into how companies and leaders can build great a great corporate culture.

1.     Build a solid employment brand. It starts with understanding what makes your organization unique. Once you have it, promote it; find every opportunity to talk about the company brand. Write articles, post employee survey results, sit on panel discussions, talk with reporters in addition to the more common approach of building a great career website and distributing job openings in both typical and non-standard places. Make sure that everyone knows yours is a great place to work.

If you’re a good employer, employees will want to work for you. Existing employee loyalty will go up and when you do need to hire new people you will be attracting talent that want to work for your company versus have to find a job.

Now is the time to be further developing your corporate culture because you can bet your competition is.

2.     Consider sabbaticals or approved / arranged boomerangs. We all know what a sabbatical is. In office terms a boomerang is when an employee leaves a company and then later returns to work for the company.

Imagine offering an agreed upon leave of absence like sabbaticals and boomerangs to employees who meet or exceed expectations to achieve a personal goal or gain new skills. 

Neither sabbaticals or boomerangs need to be for a year. Why not let them be can be as flexible as required. And, perhaps you can arrange employees spend some time in the office so you don’t lose all productivity. For example, imagine having a strong employee who requests a 3-month sabbatical to take a few courses or earn a professional certificate to help them further their career. Depending on their schedule they may even be able to work 2-days a week. Or imagine letting an employee take a 2-month boomerang to take their dream vacation.

Offering flexible options will provide a clear example of how you trust and value employees while giving them some autonomy. Employees who negotiate sabbaticals and boomerangs are going to be even more valuable when they return because they will always have a fresh perspective and likely be more hard-working than ever. If nothing more, they will be more loyal. And let’s be clear, in most cases you will save thousands of dollars versus the high cost of recruiting new talent in highly competitive business environments and opportunity lost when valued employees see no other way to get ahead than to quit… or worse, to not take a dream course or vacation, feel resentful about it and stay.

Whenever you can, create a workplace where employees feel comfortable being themselves and is built on mutual respect and mutual benefit.

Thank you for your interest in building a supportive company culture.

An other article you might like.

Why Trust Matters and How To Build Trust At Work

About Bruce and Bruce Mayhew Consulting.

Bruce is Corporate Trainer, Keynote Speaker and Executive Coach.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting specializes in customized Email Etiquette Training, Leadership & New Leadership Development, Generational Differences, Time Management Training and other soft skills training solutions in Toronto and across Canada. Bruce is also an Executive Coach to a few select clients.

Bruce is an experienced motivational speaker in Toronto and has inspired audiences across Canada and within the USA and the UK. Bruce works hard to always make sure your training event, conference, retreat, or annual general meeting is a success.

How Leaders Can Use "The Motivation Myth" by Jeff Haden

For as far back as I can remember I’ve believed you can’t motivate anyone… but you can inspire them (or yourself) to do great things. Motivation however, comes from within. 

Jeff Haden’s book “The Motivation Myth” is a whole book dedicated to this idea, and I find it inspiring.

In “The Motivation Myth” Jeff takes us on a deep dive into how to motivate ourselves. Using those same techniques I see a direct line on how leaders can inspire others to achieve greatness.

One of the other great things Jeff does is provide solid reasons why motivation surges often evaporate regardless of our best intentions. And, since Jeff is Inc's most popular columnist, an author, speaker, ghost writer, cyclist, husband and so much more, I trust that if anyone knows about motivation, it is Jeff Haden.

How Leaders Can Use “The Motivation Myth”

Leaders can use the “The Motivation Myth” by embracing Jeff’s basic idea that motivation isn’t satisfying. What Jeff believes is satisfying is when we see the results from our effort and feel a sense of success and accomplishment. This makes total sense to me. So much of what I write about in my leadership articles and speak about when I give presentations and training events is the idea that one of the best things leaders can do to help someone is to learn how to inspire them.

As leaders we need to help others feel proud of what they are doing, learning and accomplishing… and this is easier than most of us imagine.

I believe you and I and all the people around us at work are inspired by only five core desires. This of course assumes we are paid a fair wage and our physical and emotional safety is not an issue. The five desires that inspire employee engagement are:

1. Competence: To be great at a task by gaining experience and using that experience.

2. Autonomy: To be trusted so that we have a choice on what we work on, when and how.

3. Purpose: To know our work is important… that what we are doing has meaning and won’t be wasted.

4. Impact: To know we are making a difference and whatever happens will be better because of us and our efforts.

5. Connection: To be part of a ‘Tribe’ as I’m sure author and speaker Seth Godin would say.

As a leader, this short list makes it easy to keep track of how we can inspire anyone, from our employees through to our children and pretty much anyone else we meet.

When people are inspired by what they accomplish, this success as Jeff calls it in “The Motivation Myth” will give them a rush. And because they like that rush they will want to feel that again and again. That is what drives people to do more of the thing that gives them a sense of ‘Competence’ or ‘Autonomy’ or ‘Purpose’ or whatever they crave.

Whatever button (desire) turns them on, be sure to push that button… or those buttons. This is when they will begin to feel sustained motivation!

It is important to note that different people will have a different hierarchy to this list of five desires. So, as a great leader, take time to learn which desires are the most important to each of the people around you. Is it a drive for ‘Competence’ or, do they light up when they know they have had ‘Impact’? One desire isn’t better than the other – they just are. And, as I teach in my training, be prepared for someone’s inspiration desire to change; especially if they have a life-changing event like a wedding, a birth, an illness or perhaps have purchased a new home. 

What About Self-Motivation?

Should you ask of yourself “What motivates me? ”Ug. No! Stop asking that question. Instead ask “What inspires me?” and“What makes me happy?”

As we have discussed above, a key message of “The Motivation Myth” is to stop waiting for motivation to hit. Instead, do something that makes you feel proud… feel success. Even if you take one small step, experience how wonderful it feels. Even if it is a bit scary it still feels great right? And, take notice of what you learned about the task and/or about yourself. That is all pretty exciting and that is what gives you the motivation to take another step.

Set yourself a goal and then write out all the steps you can think of that will lead you to that goal. Then, Jeff says ignore the goal. Only focus on the one step in front of you. Put yourself on a path and start experiencing each step. Live in the present, not the future. Feel pride and success as you accomplish that first step… and then move on to the next step on the path.

One last thing. I believe it’s important you expect your path to change over time. You may need to add a step or take a step away. You may need more time or less time. That is OK. Remember, you are likely experiencing new things and meeting new people and learning new skills. That is exciting - inspiring. Embrace that exciting, inspiring feeling. Take pride in your accomplishments. Everything is OK as long as you stay open – stay present and stay curious as you pay attention to your plan. The next thing you know you have accomplished your goal.

Thank you for reading about how leaders can use “The Motivation Myth” by Jeff Haden. It is a great book that explores how high achievers really set themselves up to win. If you have not read it, I recommend you do. I also think it is a great approach leaders can use to inspire their team. I will enjoy your comments / suggestions of this article.

Bruce

About Bruce and Bruce Mayhew Consulting.

Bruce is Corporate Trainer, Keynote Speaker and Executive Coach.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting specializes in customized Email Etiquette Training, Leadership & New Leadership Development, Generational Differences, Time Management Training and other soft skills training solutions in Toronto and across Canada. Bruce is also an Executive Coach to a few select clients.

Bruce is an experienced motivational speaker in Toronto and has inspired audiences across Canada and within the USA and the UK. Bruce works hard to always make sure your training event, conference, retreat, or annual general meeting is a success.

Are Generational Differences Important To Study And Discuss?

Generational differences are real – just like cultural differences are real. In this article we’ll discuss generational differences in the workplace and why discussions about generational differences and generational diversity are important for team success.

What are generational differences? When looking to define generational differences we typically mean differences in experiences, values, beliefs and needs. The answer to the question, “are generational differences important?” depends on how we use the information. If we use it to determine how I will act as an individual or what kind of reward will inspire me, then making assumptions based on what year I was born will likely not do either of us much good. But if we use the information to estimate how a group of consumers in one generation and from one geographic area will respond, we will likely get close to making a good (but not perfect) decision.

This begs the question, “How does labelling employees by generation help or harm employee, team success?”

Overview

Today’s workspaces currently have employees from four generations all holding junior through to senior positions. And of course, each generation brings very different and valuable perspectives, experiences and insights. In addition, on one side of the age spectrum is a large group of young employees who likely are highly educated and are used to a fast-changing world. On the other side of the age spectrum is a large group of older employees with unparalleled experience, institutional knowledge and typically less formal education.

To be clear, I’m not saying Gen Z and Millennial employees don’t have experience, they do; and I’m not saying Gen X and Boomer employees don’t have education because they do. What I’m saying is there are people from four very different generations who all have something unique and very worthwhile to say (and if we know what is good for us and our companies) to be listened to.

Globalization also means we have valued employees (and customers) from many different countries with values, needs and traditions that further add to the complexity and amazing insight of our workspaces. And while I could talk more about cultural differences, for the purpose of this article I’m going to stay with discussions about the importance of generational differences and generational diversity (for the most part).

The diversity and inclusive energy in todays high-functioning workspaces is quite amazing. One of the great trends of the last 10ish years that is adding to this positive energy is that many in the business world are finally seriously focusing on important topics like team development, trust and accountability. Along with the strong focus on diversity and inclusion there is also a heightened refocus on important issues like creativity, equality and accessibility. When we talk about diversity and inclusion in the workplace, we often think of things like race, culture, gender and sexuality. But age is another important aspect within the diversity and inclusion discussion.

For reference, the following are general categories in Canada and the USA. Please note, generational birth ranges do vary from country to country and east to west:

• Baby Boomers (born 1946 to 1964)

• Generation X (born 1965 to 1980)

• Millennials / Generation Y (born 1980 to 1995)

• Generation Z (born 1996 to 2010)

Generational Differences Training: Argument For 

The simple reality is that there are differences in populations from different generations. For example, some high-level generational differences are as follows:

• Boomers grew up in the economic boom following the depression. They had very little in the way of money or possessions and physical labour was the bulk of available work. Hard work and loyalty was part of their basic upbringing. From a career perspective it was generally expected that employees would be loyal to companies and companies would be loyal to their employees. As young adults many Boomers became uncomfortable with the economic structures and began rebelling, wanting a better quality of life.

• Generation X often grew up with their mothers returning to work and wanting to have their own career, therefore many grew up in two-income families. Generation X kids were also the first generation to grow up with computers. They were children who watched the Vietnam war unravel on live TV (and in colour). They also experienced corporate America consolidate and lay off their loyal parents and move manufacturing to developing countries. For many of these reasons Generation X lead the charge of wanting greater work-life-balance.

• Millennials grew up with most families able to provide for them better that any previous family structure. They had exposure to computers at a young age, video games and diversity like no generation before them. Their parents were known as ‘Helicopter Parents’ giving their children lots of pre-planned activities, positive reinforcement and often less independent freedom. Traditionally Millennials want feedback frequently because that is what their Boomer parents gave them.

• Generation Z are often seen as being financially conservative but socially liberal. Why? Because they saw their Millennial brothers, sisters and cousins collect large amounts of debt through education but have fewer job opportunities than expected. Generation Z children traveled widely with their parents and grew up with computers from birth, giving them instant access to information and entertainment. At school, many cultural stereotypes were broken because their schoolmates (and friends), came from many different cultures and backgrounds. At the same time the entertainment they consumed and their family structures often broke many gender based stereotypes.

Now that we’ve explored a few of the generational differences, how might labelling employees by age generation help or harm employee, team and organization success? I believe the #1 greatest benefit from generational differences training is how it helps us understand ‘Why’ certain generations behave the way they do. With an understanding of ‘Why’ we humans are naturally more patient and empathic. Instead of treating everyone the same, great leaders and great companies use discussions about generational differences as opportunities to recognize employees are different and that they can embrace these differences to help their employees, their company and of course their customers to be successful.

This is a big step for companies. Don’t undervalue its importance and how difficult traditional management style is to overcome. Consider, almost all of the 1900’s hard work (and I mean physical labour) translated to success. In this environment money was the primary motivator because with money you could buy what you needed to survive.

Today we know money isn’t the best motivator. As long as we are being paid fairly based on our industry and work, people don’t want to only survive… we want to thrive. This means most employees want to embrace their own definition of work-life-balance. In the last 40+ years a whole new business psychology industry has slowly been emerging that studies and measures the impact of what really motivates and inspires employees. Through that research we finally began seeing the undisputable reality that intrinsic motivation… like pride, purpose and impact is far more effective and longer lasting than extrinsic motivation… like money.

Generational Differences Training: Argument Against 

The worst thing we can do is use stereotypes to determine how individuals will act or what individuals need. If we use stereotypes we will undoubtably make mistakes that will stop a company from hiring a great employee or by not rewarding a valued employee as they need to be rewarded and therefore, they quit.

Without doubt employees should be assessed on their unique ability to do a task and rewarded based on their individual abilities, needs and goals. Except at some high-level marketing level, I can’t think of many helpful situations where the generational label would be effective in predicting behviour.

Conclusion

All we have to do is look within our own families, our brothers and sisters who grew up with the values and often in the same households to see we as individuals we want different things and are inspired in different ways. We are both similar and different, and this is an example of why discussions about generational differences and generational diversity are important.

Beyond allowing me and others to generally understand the ‘Why’ of a generation or culture I have to admit, I’ve found that one of the most important benefits generational differences training delivers is in how it helps the teams I’ve worked with discuss – and often be amazed by how diverse people are. Through these discussions participants experience in real-time the insight (often for the first time), that what inspires one person will likely not inspire another person even if they are from the same generation and doing the same work in the same company. I bet some of your coworkers want to buy a house and raise a family while others want to rent a condo on the 30th floor and travel… and I bet some want to own an energy efficient electric car while others dream of a F150 pickup truck. For many of employees, the choices relating to how they live their lives are endless.

We are all individuals with unique training, skill, motivation and ambitions and it is best that instead of making assumptions, we stay curious as to what others value, believe and need. In the end, what is important is that you strive for greater generational diversity and treat everyone with curiosity and respect.

Thank you for reading. I will enjoy your comments / suggestions.

Bruce

About Bruce and Bruce Mayhew Consulting.

Bruce is Corporate Trainer, Keynote Speaker and Executive Coach.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting specializes in customized Email Etiquette Training, Leadership & New Leadership Development, Generational Differences, Time Management Training and other soft skills training solutions in Toronto and across Canada. Bruce is also an Executive Coach to a few select clients.

Bruce is an experienced motivational speaker in Toronto and has inspired audiences across Canada and within the USA and the UK. Bruce works hard to always make sure your training event, conference, retreat, or annual general meeting is a success.

Why Trust Matters and How To Build Trust At Work

A productive team trusts each other.

Building a successful team takes self-awareness and courage; it also takes empathy, listening and trust. 

Trust is when you can depend on something or someone… at least this is the definition I work with. Yes, this is a simple definition, but even so trust is often elusive… especially trust at work.

While doing research for this article I came across the following quote from D. Bowlby that stopped me cold because it's so amazingly relevant to a leader from my past I had to endure.

“If you do not trust your own judgments, actions, and decisions, you will question the motives of others."

Imagine the damage a leader can do to the morale and cohesion of a team when, instead of trusting recommendations as points for discussion, their own ego sees any and all recommendations as threats. In one particular instance I know of, the leader even went so far as to allege unsubstantiated workplace harassment and bullying against members of their senior team. This unfortunately is a real example that lead to months of stress, expense and long-term loss of income for the organization and the many people caught in the leaders loosely cast - ego driven net. Sadly, I am sure this scenario has played out many times in corporations and associations of all sizes.

There are many ways to destroy trust. For example, laughing at an idea or observation a fellow team member has is one of the most efficient ways to destroy trust… and show disrespect. Another is to cast aside recommendations using the age-old and exhausting excuse, “We tried that in the past and it didn’t work.” In my opinion, anyone who has lived through the last 12 months... never mind the last century should know nothing can be taken for granted, there are always lessons to be learned and whatever didn’t work yesterday might very well work today or in the future.

But enough of the negative; lets look at how to build trust on a team.

Patrick Lencioni, author of Five Dysfunctions of a Team and founder of the Table Group describes trust in two ways:

1. Predictive Trust

2. Vulnerability Based Trust

The following are my professional reflections of these two types of trust.

Predictive Trust is usually built over time – from experience. My interpretation of Predictive Trust is when I can count on (or predict) what you will say or do in a certain circumstance. For example: If my partner asks, “Do you want ice-cream?” he can trust I will say, “Yes please.”

Vulnerability Based Trust is when you and I feel safe saying something like “I don’t know,” “I made a mistake,” or “I am sorry” and we know we will still be treated with respect – not embarrassed or attacked. Vulnerability Trust means you can be in a meeting and suggest a course of action or idea and you will not fear you may be laughed at or mocked. I believe Vulnerability Trust is more personal – more tender.

Based on the Difficult Conversations training I do with clients, I would say Vulnerability Trust is also where someone can say to me, “You messed up” “You are letting the team down” or “I can’t give you what you want” and I will stay open and keep listening because I trust the other person is sharing information in good faith and likely for my benefit, even if it’s difficult / disappointing for me to hear. Vulnerability Trust is where two people can discuss sensitive topics and even disagree, but stay present and keep doing their best work, moving forward to find solutions instead of assigning blame to setbacks and gaps. It’s when team members can stay in discussion / dialogue without being defensive or shutting down.

How To Develop Productive Trustworthy Teams

To develop productive teams Patrick Lencioni believes leaders must intentionally nurture vulnerability and I 100% agree. 

The following are two ways leaders can build trust within their team. Then, at the end of this article I quickly reference 11 more ways to create a safe, trusting workplace culture.

But before I go any further, I want to be perfectly clear that not all leaders have the title ‘leader’. In many big and small ways leadership responsibilities are often shared between co-workers depending on what is needed by the team and the project at that moment.

1. The quickest way to build vulnerability trust on a team is for the leader to demonstrate it. Otherwise, why would a team trust their leader if the leader never trusted or respected their team / team members? The best leaders quickly acknowledge when they need help and (equally importantly) their mistakes. Trusted leaders don't take control of every situation; they don't pretend they are all-knowing, and they don’t get ‘defensive’ when asked a question or given advice. Team members gain confidence when leaders are honest and respectful and demonstrate its ok to speak up when they have a question and/or an opinion. They start thinking things like “Since my leader is honest and up front with me, I can see it's OK for me to be honest and upfront with them,” and “There are things I can do and things I cannot do, the important thing is to ask each other for help.”

2. Another way for anyone to build vulnerability trust is to give credit to others. A trustworthy leader will not think twice before saying something like, “I know you have been working on this, and while I think you are doing well it’s a long journey and I do hope you stick with it,” or “I know bringing your concerns to me was not easy and I want to acknowledge that. I’m pleased we can be honest and open.”

Of course vulnerability trust also strengthens relationships between co-workers. The important thing to know is that this works… it really really works!

• I’ve worked with leaders who show disconnected individuals how to trust each other, turning them into highly productive and highly loyal teams who have a renewed loyalty to each other and the organization.

• I’ve seen great teams disintegrate when a great leader leaves and a weak leader replaces them. Recently leader I admire shared with me that in just over one year his previous team of 20 loyal, hard working professionals (who also found time to laugh with each other), experienced 100% turnover except for one person. Imagine! 

11 Ways To Create A Safe, Trusting Workplace Culture

Here are 11 ways leaders and teams create a safe, trusting work culture (yes, some of these mean we have to be vulnerable… but if we are not willing to be, it sends a signal that others cannot be either):

1. Eliminate disparaging talk and gossip. We have to all feel safe and that we are being open, honest, respectful and respected.

2. Be transparent and honest about goals, challenges, news. Share ‘What’ and ‘Why’.

3. Know your preferred work style and strengths and take time to understand and appreciate another's work styles and strengths. Myers Brigs and SuccessFinder are two great tools to use, learn from and share with your team.

4. Take time to learn about each other but don’t push if people want to be more private than you.

5. Share your successes and also share your failures - this gives others permission to make mistakes

6. Admit when you are wrong, make mistakes and readily apologize.

7. Acknowledge and celebrate the successes of others.

8. Listen to others and take their advice – help them be proud by giving them credit for their ideas and experience.

9. Be willing to learn from each other. Leaders especially need to demonstrate they don’t know it all and are willing to learn from their team.

10. Don’t make assumptions about people’s behaviour or actions – watch your conscious and unconscious biases especially concerning challenging news.

11. Don’t hold grudges – deal with situations, learn from them and move on – be an example.

While trust is the main topic of this blog post, you may also be interested in a blog I wrote last year called 5 Stages of Team Development.

It takes courage and bravery to build trust… especially vulnerability trust. There will be times you wish you didn’t, but as Brené Brown says, “If you choose courage, you will absolutely know disappointment, setback and even heartbreak. That’s why we call it courage.” But I promise you, trusting yourself and others gives you a unique strength.

BONUS: Trust Helps When Hearing Bad News

We can begin to manage our defence triggers (fight & flight) when we know we are respected, supported and won’t be made a fool of. When we trust we learn to stay present and listen to unpleasant feedback or be part of decisions that, while they go against our personal or professional self-interest, we can still support because we know the decisions are made with honesty and in-line with the agreed upon goals.

Conclusion

While it is possible for great teams to form without a strong leader, the most productive, most loyal teams exist when a strong leader createsa safe, trusting, transparent workspace where team members feel they belong and are treated with dignity and respect. The beauty is, when you have trust you can have conflict. I don’t mean conflict like wars and fighting… I mean discussions, (perhaps even loud passionate discussions), but still discussions that show respect and appreciation.

To end, I want to leave you with this one thought. I wish I could remember where I read it and who to credit; I’m not even sure I am quoting it right, but here it goes, “You can’t trust when you have to sacrifice respectful honesty in order to protect and feed someone ego.” Please, don’t be the person with an ego that others have to protect.

Thank you for reading. I will enjoy hearing your comments, feedback and even examples about workplace culture, predictive trust and vulnerability trust.

Bruce

About Bruce and Bruce Mayhew Consulting.

Bruce is Corporate Trainer, Keynote Speaker and Executive Coach.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting specializes in customized Email Etiquette Training, Leadership & New Leadership Development, Generational Differences, Time Management Training and other soft skills training solutions in Toronto and across Canada. Bruce is also an Executive Coach to a few select clients.

Bruce is an experienced motivational speaker in Toronto and has inspired audiences across Canada and within the USA and the UK. Bruce works hard to always make sure your training event, conference, retreat, or annual general meeting is a success.

Thank you for stopping by.

Learn to write smarter and faster; Get more done while protecting your reputation.

“Copy is not written. Copy is assembled.” – Eugene Schwartz (copywriter).

Because most of the writing you and I do is email, I’m going to adjust Eugene Schwartz’s quote to be, “Great email isn’t written, it is assembled.”

None of us read email for the fun of it. Writing is never our goal – getting our work done is. Whenever we write our goal isn’t achieved until our reader understands what we said and/or does what we asked them to do. Unfortunately there are many obstacles in the way, especially when we write email. One obstacle we often forget is that our readers may not be expecting (or wanting) our message. Another obstacle may be our current reputation; if we have a history of being unclear or rude you can imagine our email are not going to get read quickly.

We fail when the email we write don’t get read, understood or acted upon. But, failure isn’t an option when we are at work. We ‘have’ tobe successful. And, because email is how we communicate 90% of the time, we ‘have’ to write. So, I believe the important question we must all ask is, “As writers, how do we assemble our email so that it cuts through all the other email, priorities and ever-increasing distractions our readers are experiencing?”

In this article I want to give you a fresh approach to writing smarter and faster and getting more done while protecting our reputation in three simple steps.

Assemble Step 1. Be Polite

Say Hello.

Before writing what we need our readers to know or do, just say ‘Hello’ or ‘Hi’. 

Saying ‘Hello’ or ‘Hi’ is one of the best ways to grab someone’s attention. It’s also the best way to take the rude, abrupt and bossy feel out of your message. Readers notice (in a good way) when we say ‘Hi’. Why? Because saying ‘Hi’ is polite. If we don’t say ‘Hi’ it’s like storming into their office unannounced. #Rude

The exception I will offer you is that if you are writing with someone 20 times a day or more you can both agree to not do this because it will likely get annoying. But, still do it for your first email of the day.

Assemble Step 2. Don’t Make Writing Complicated

After saying hello, get-to-the-point in your first sentence. We all are busy and we don’t have the time or the interest to become a great novelist like Margaret Atwood or great copywriter like Eugene Schwartz.

To write great email we have to consider what information our reader already knows in our first sentence. Also, what new information might they need? Our readers will start skimming and we will lose their interest if we write about things they already know. You know this is true because you do it when you are bored by someone’s email. And, we will put them at a disadvantage and potentially delay them giving us the information we need if we don’t include the information they need.

Another tip to keep our writing simple is to keep flowery descriptions, complicated jargon and technical terms to a minimum. If we don’t, we are falling into a trap called ‘the curse of knowledge’ says Harvard psychologist, communication specialist and author Steven Pinker which he defines as“a difficulty in imagining what it is like for someone else not to know something that you know”. 

Assemble Step 3. Write Sentences With Benefits First

To always get our email read, writers have to break a few habits as we learn to assemble our sentences starting with benefit first. 

Look at that last sentence and how I structured it. I have put the ‘why’ first. 

I could have written, “Writers have to break a few habits as we learn to write our sentence starting with benefits first in order to keep our readers interest.” While this second sentence generally works, we risk boring our readers with detail before we tell them ‘why’ that detail is important. And, if our readers get bored – they will move on. Unfortunately, most of us were taught in school to put information first and then follow with benefit and action item.

This is one of my favourite tips and it can be used in all your writing - not just email and instant messaging. So, don’t bore your readers; grab their attention and interest quickly. I do want to warn you, even though it sounds easy to do, it will require some practice and paying attention to your structure. 

Conclusion:

Every time we write email or instant messages, we are adding or subtracting from our reputation and the reputation of our company. In addition, when our messages are misunderstood, not even read and/or when our tone is interpreted as bossy or angry, the result is that mistakes are made, time is wasted and expenses go up.

The importance of well-written / well-assembled communication is high.

So, before hitting ‘Send’ on your next email, take a moment to ask, “Am I addressing my readers needs and how likely is it that my reader will understand and be able to act on my message?” If your answers to these two questions are‘Yes’ and ‘Very Likely’ then you have done a great job of building a trusting relationship and accomplishing your key goals.

Bruce Mayhew Consulting specializes in customized Email Etiquette Training, Leadership & New Leadership Development, Generational Differences, Time Management Training and other soft skills training solutions in Toronto and across Canada. Bruce is also an Executive Coach to a few select clients.

Bruce is an experienced motivational speaker in Toronto and has inspired audiences across Canada and within the USA and the UK. Bruce works hard to always make sure your training event, conference, retreat, or annual general meeting is a success.

Thank you for stopping by.

Turn Conflict And Difficult Conversations Into Positive Experiences

Employees are feeling disconnected and with many business engagements now taking place virtually these feelings are increasing and conflict is increasing. But lets take a moment to notice that not all conflict is bad - and look at when it does happen how can we manage it effectively.

I want to acknowledge the word ‘conflict’ has quite a broad definition. For this article I lean towards the definition from dictionary.com “verb: To come into collision or disagreement; be contradictory, at variance, or in opposition”

With this definition in mind, what do you think of the idea that conflict is not only natural, but that conflict and difficult conversations can be signs of a healthy relationship?

We often think of conflict and difficult conversations as bad; something to avoid. But should we? Sometimes conflict leads to something good. I’m sure we can all remember a moment of conflict that lead to new and exciting opportunities that enriched our lives by challenging us to meet new people and do new things. For example, when I worked in banking, I can remember a promotion I didn’t get (and yes, I was disappointed and disagreed with my bosses decision), but that loss motivated me to explore even greater – challenging opportunities I couldn’t have imagined. Instead of shutting me down for the rest of my career, it activated me. What I once considered as terrible news and negative conflict, I now describe as good a positive experience because it helped me change in ways I am very proud of.

Changing Our Approach:

What if we began thinking of conflict as an opportunity for two people to explore each others opposing viewpoints or expectations versus ‘a need to win a fight or prolonged battle’? What if we started thinking of conflict and difficult conversations as being something that can be a force of good that can challenge us (perhaps both of us), to become better individuals?

This is what I would like to discuss. So, lets explore how can we turn conflict and difficult conversations into positive experiences.

Start With Connection:

Whether we are delivering or receiving challenging news, start with honoring our connection and our relationship with the other person. Just because I don’t agree with you doesn’t mean I shouldn’t respect you. But, if I let our difference of opinion shut down my ability to connect with you and discuss / learn from you then we both lose before we even begin.

We may be an introvert or extrovert, but either way we all thrive for some level of connection; it is how we are wired – humans want to be connected. So, whenever you have a conversation, especially a difficult conversation, I encourage you to be sure to talk with your heart – tap into your empathy. Be aware of:

• What are you feeling?

• What do you feel they are feeling?

• What are you needing?

• What are they needing?

Safety and respect are two of our strongest needs. So, if you are going to tell someone they didn’t get the promotion, instead of thinking to yourself “I’m going to have a bad morning. I have to tell Joe he didn’t get the promotion,” start with the approach“I want to make sure Joe feels safe in my presence and respected by me and the company.”

Whether we are giving or getting bad news, when you and I feel safe we are more likely to stay calm and think through difficult situations. Making a connection helps us stay present and be able to discuss options. You and I also know that when the body feels fear it goes into protection mode – fight or flight. This means biology starts taking over as we feel the rush of adrenaline. When the body doesn’t feel safe it’s a bad time to try to have a difficult conversation – our body is looking to protect us and to deal with the fear verses think logically through a situation.

To have a difficult conversation make sure everyone feels safe. If you both are working in an office, choose a private space where the other person won’t feel vulnerable and both of you can speak clearly without interruption or distraction. If working remotely, do the same. Another good option to help people feel safe is to consider your timing. For example, share difficult news early in the day when everyone is less likely to be physically and emotionally exhausted from their day.

Practice Your First Sentence:

Using the example above, the idea is to continue making sure Joe feels safe and respected and to try to reinforce your connection.

Empathy is important here. One recommendation I have is that it is OK to talk about emotion but don’t be emotional (i.e.: stay calm, don’t raise your voice). 

A good first sentence might sound something like the following: “Joe, I’m sorry I have to share you didn’t get the job. I can see that this is disappointing.” You may want to pause here and see what Joe has to say. Alternatively, you can continue with something like, “Joe, while we didn’t think this was the best fit for you, I want to reinforce you are a valuable member of the team and I am glad you chose to put your name forward. It shows us you want more for yourself with the company. What I would like to do is now or later this week (if you would choose to do it later), is for us to look closer at your goals for the future and how I can support you.”

Sure, Joe is still going to be disappointed. But, he is also likely going to feel safe, respected and supported. And, you should expect that Joe is still going to want to talk about why he didn’t get the promotion, but he is more likely to be open to the news and future possibilities with this more supportive approach.

The most important thing you must do is ‘be authentic’. As I suggested earlier, don’t make this about you or the company. The wrong approach is saying something like, “I have to tell you and two other candidates you didn’t get the job. This is the worst part of my job and I am sorry I have to do this. I didn’t sleep a wink last night because I feel so bad and if I could give you all the promotion I would, but I can’t.”

If Joe does get emotional because adrenaline kicked in, stay present and listen. If you stay calm it is likely Joe will calm down quickly… but if he doesn’t, take a break, invite Joe to stay in the room as you go get both of you a glass of water. If you need to take a break for a day or two, be sure to come back to the conversation. Stay open to what the other person is going through.

Conclusion:

Feelings of conflict mean that something is important to you and to others. If we didn’t care it would not be conflict or a difficult conversation. Let’s remember:

1. One of the best things we can know is to know we are being heard.

2. When people feel they are being heard they are going to be more open to compromise – or understanding. They will be more open to understanding ‘why’.

Lastly, we can do our best to set the stage for success, but in the end, we can only control ourselves. If the other person isn’t ready to have a difficult conversation, then there is nothing we can do – if we are trying to be kind and they only see hostility it is OK to know we are trying to do our best and that they may just need some time. Sometimes the best solution is to mindfully step away and return to the conversation a day or two later.  Let’s just stay focused on what each of our goals are and what each of our needs are.

Life is messy. Let’s stay open and embrace it all.

Thank you for reading. I hope you have enjoyed exploring how to turn conflict and difficult conversations into positive experiences.

Bruce

About Bruce and Bruce Mayhew Consulting.

Bruce is Corporate Trainer and Executive Coach.

As a Corporate Trainer Bruce Mayhew (of BMC) specialize in customized Time Management Training, Email Etiquette Training, Leadership & New Leadership Development, Generational Differences and other soft skills training solutions in Toronto and across Canada. Bruce is also an Executive Coach to a few select clients.

BMC helps your greatest assets think productive and be productive.

Bruce is an experienced motivational speaker in Toronto and has inspired audiences across Canada and within the USA and the UK. Bruce works hard to always make sure your training event, conference, retreat, or annual general meeting is a success.

How I Help Leaders Explore How Leadership Has Changed

The following are an edit of my notes from a Podcast interview I gave about leadership and how to develop an energized corporate culture with motivated, inspired employees.

Because of the length of my notes, this is Part 1 of what will be a two-part series. 

Please enjoy… and watch out for Part 2. Also, please consider liking and leaving comments below.

How I Help Leaders

I help new and experienced leaders understand how leadership has changed over the years and how they may be able to do better. There have been important changes in how to approach leadership especially in the three important areas of; coaching your team, motivation versus inspiration, and how to create a diverse and thriving corporate culture. I help clients and conference attendees explore their experiences and ask important questions of themselves and the world around them by creating a safe space where learning is important.

I see leaders fitting within a couple of buckets. There are:

1. Leaders who have been around for 30 or more years and who came into leadership when everyone around them was just like themselves. Their co-workers and customers wanted the same things so it was easy to understand what someone else expected. They lived in a world where the leader was the boss, laptop computers were a novelty and the size of small suitcases, email was a new communication tool that few people had access to, and unless you were a sales person the only way you could be productive was to be ‘at work’ where you had a desk, a phone and likely a secretary and/or access to a typing pool. Even voicemail was a new thing.

2. Young leaders who have grown up in a very different world than their parents and likely their initial role-models. They see a world where everyone has a voice (or should), is constantly connected by the internet, their mobile phones have more memory and processing power than the Apollo 11 guidance computer – a spacecraft that landed on the moon in 1972 (source: RealClear Science), empowering information is only a Google search and YouTube video away, and where choice and individuality are not only robust, they are expected and most people correctly recognize diversity as an empowering asset. 

I believe exploring and acknowledging these differences and the generational differences in the workplace is important, not to marginalize anyone but because it is important for each of us to understand the world we live in and then recognize the world we came from. Before we can begin to understand others we have to understand ourselves and our experiences. And for leaders, understanding our own perspective and our experiences really matters in how we lead, mentor, coach and inspire the people that depend on us. 

The interesting component here is that when Boomers and Generation X raised their Millennial and Generation Z children, they told their kids they could do anything and have anything and not to compromise. Then when these generations entered the workplace their, Boomer and Generation X leaders often interpret their curiosity and independence as entitlement and wonder, “Why they can’t just sit at their desk and do the work I’m telling them to do?” even though Millennials and Generation Z are behaving exactly how their parents raised them.

So, as a Corporate Trainer and Executive Coach I help leaders of all ages see how the world has changed and explore research I share with them as well as their own experiences to help understand what motivates individuals from all generations in the workplace. Motivators like having a purpose, personal growth, making a difference, feeling like they are contributing and wanting to have fun at work are all the elements of a thriving corporate culture that inspires employees. It’s important to note that while approaches to leadership are changing, Boomers are not used to thinking this way (I say this as a Boomer). No fault of our own. When they were young most Boomers didn’t work to have a purpose and be inspired, they went to work to get a paycheck so they could get a house and provide for their family. Work for a Boomer was often separate from their life but for Millennials and Gen Z… and even some Gen Xers, all of it is integrated.

The beauty is that most people no matter what generation they are from can tap into this concept pretty easily because it makes sense and is empowering. They can reflect on what they feel and want themselves as well as what they see their employees asking for. The people I work with or the audiences I present to also recognize that seeing something and being able to implement it are two different things – but change is possible. For all of us to change means we have to break our old habits (or expectations) about being a boss… and with desire, attention and often a bit of guidance change happens and is wonderful for everyone.

This is the base line of where I start. I help clients and/or conference attendees take the next step to realize difference is ok; that great leaders use that difference and use each other’s strengths. That the world is far too complex and great leaders embrace the diversity of:

·      Four different generations being in the workforce (age diversity).

·      People being equal regardless of their gender or sexual orientation.

·      Cultural and religious differences.

·      Disability / Ability.

Being a great leader requires taking time to reflect on ourselves and the environment we want to create. It’s being a coach who believes that one of their primary goals is to empower and inspire their employees to be their best and to do their own work.

Conclusion - and prelude to Part 2.

To be a great leader we have to be able to create an empowered corporate culture that gives people space to contribute their ideas while they also learn, grow and be proud of what they are contributing… and the difference they and the company are making together. Great leaders build a corporate culture that is truly based on the values of the organization then that creates a space where trust and motivation and respect become a common environment. Part of that is hiring the right people… and that is one of the key focuses I’ll discuss in part 2.

Thank you for reading. I hope you have enjoyed. Please leave a comment if have a moment.

Bruce

About Bruce and Bruce Mayhew Consulting.

Bruce is Corporate Trainer and Executive Coach.

As a Corporate Trainer Bruce Mayhew (of BMC) specialize in customized Time Management Training, Email Etiquette Training, Leadership & New Leadership Development, Generational Differences and other soft skills training solutions in Toronto and across Canada. Bruce is also an Executive Coach to a few select clients.

BMC helps your greatest assets think productive and be productive.

Bruce is an experienced motivational speaker in Toronto and has inspired audiences across Canada and within the USA and the UK. Bruce works hard to always make sure your training event, conference, retreat, or annual general meeting is a success. 

Effective Meeting Management: How to Run Effective Meetings

You have a great team. For their professional development, as well as the benefit of the company, you want to help them run effective meetings. You’ve seen how they suffer through long, unproductive, time-wasting meetings that go off-track and leave them wondering why they were invited.

I applaud you for wanting to make a difference. By wanting to help your team run effective meetings you’ll also be able to save time, save money, reduce waste, increase productivity, improve your employees workplace satisfaction… and i could go on. Yep, meeting management training is a Win-Win.

Before we go deeper into this, I want to invite you to cut everyone some slack (including yourself), who has hosted an insufferable meeting. Why? Because no school I know of teaches an Effective Meeting Management 101 course. This means most people host meetings based on what they learned by watching others. Thankfully, that was yesterday and you’re making sure tomorrow will be a brand new day!

The first challenge you will face as you help your team run effective meetings is the need to change corporate culture. As the book title by Erin L. Bouma says, ‘Big Ships Turn Slowly.’’ Even if your company is small or if you are focused on improving one team, changing a persons behaviour isn’t the easiest thing to do – even if they are willing participants. But you are dedicated (yea), so to change the way your team runs meetings you will need two things:

• Unwavering leadership commitment (this means you if you are only focusing on your team)

• Individual employee commitment… from everyone

Unwavering Leadership Commitment

I’m going to assume you have the unwavering leadership support… or you are the unwavering leadership support. Still, it’s worth doing a quick review of two important things. First, leaders have to support the new corporate meeting management standard you are going to build. Second, employees have to be confident that their leaders will consistently and unwaveringly stand by them. This means (for example):

• If there is no agenda people have the right to ask for one before they commit their time.

• Individuals are able to decline an invitation when the invitation doesn’t help them know why they were invited.

• Meetings start on time and end on time – and if people come in late that the meeting doesn’t start over.

• Minutes are always taken which mention items discussed, decisions made and / or action items (this can be a simple email after the meeting).

This is how we make sure that if we are going to attend a meeting that they will be meetings that we were proud to attend, proud of what we contributed and proud of what everyone accomplished… together. This is how we build a sense of team where everyone is efficient and has pride in the work they do. And, this is how we make sure the meetings we go to are those meetings not the long drawn out horrible type.

Individual Employee Commitment

Next we have to look at individual commitment. It’s worth noting that as the leader you’ll have a good idea of how you think meetings need to change and, you’ll have defined what you believe should be the meeting management objectives. But as we all know, the best way to get commitment is to make people part of the solution. So, have an exploratory session with your team. As you go through this exploration I bet you’ll find your team will have a few important ideas – so, stay open minded. To begin your exploration with your team I recommend spending time with two important questions.

1. “What do great meetings look like?”

2. “What are the effective meeting guidelines we will adopt?”

I would like to bring specific attention to the positive nature of these two questions. They are looking at what greatness does look like and what best practices your team does want to adopt. The positive nature of this approach is uplifting / empowering; I bet you will feel great energy. This approach is called Appreciative Inquiry which I’ve explored in other blog posts. I encourage you to not spend much time exploring negativity… like what makes bad meetings. If you feel you do need to discuss what doesn’t work, put a timeframe on it – perhaps 5-minutes and then get back to encouraging positive energy and what people can do.

Effective Meeting Guidelines

I bet you might hear someone say, “The best meeting is a meeting I don’t have to go.” And you know – they may be right considering their world today, but our goals is to turn their next meeting into their best meeting… again and again. So, let’s stay positive and think about what we want to happen in the meetings we go to; behaviours like:

• Agendas are created and shared using the agreed upon template structure

• Only relevant people are invited

• Everyone attends who is supposed to attend – and they come prepared

• Meetings start on time and end on time (or end early)

• Discussions get to the point and stay on topic

• Discussions stay positive (Appreciative Inquiry)

• Information is shared in a clear and respectful manner

• Decisions are made and action items are summarized before anyone leaves

• Meeting minutes are shared soon after the meeting using the agreed upon templated structure

As you begin to implement these new meeting guidelines you’ll see first hand that everyone will begin to be happy when they attend meetings and begin to think, ‘WOW I just accomplished something, and I feel great.’

Conclusion

Remember, changing meeting management means changing corporate culture and changing individuals habits… changing how they have always worked in the past. This change you stay committed, and that you correct and support people with ‘what they can do’ versus ‘what they did wrong’. By doing this… and by staying positive (not punitive), you will find your corporate culture and the way people run meetings will change quickly. There will be a few growing pains, but remember, ‘Big Ships Turn Slowly,’ but wow – how great it is when the turn has happened.

Thanks for reading up on Meeting Management and How to Run Effective Meetings.

If i can help you in any way, please let me know. Here is my website Meeting Management Training page.

Bruce

About Bruce and Bruce Mayhew Consulting.

Bruce is Corporate Trainer and Executive Coach.

As a Corporate Trainer Bruce Mayhew (of BMC) specialize in customized Time Management Training, Email Etiquette Training, Leadership & New Leadership Development, Generational Differences and other soft skills training solutions in Toronto and across Canada. Bruce is also an Executive Coach to a few select clients.

BMC helps your greatest assets think productive and be productive.

Bruce is an experienced motivational speaker in Toronto and has inspired audiences across Canada and within the USA and the UK. Bruce works hard to always make sure your training event, conference, retreat, or annual general meeting is a success.

10 Tips to Lead Your Team Through Change

Leading teams is a wonderful, rewarding challenge. And while most of us would not want to spend our whole career in the middle of change, leading teams through change is often even more of a rewarding challenge.

So, what does leading your team through change mean? Whether it is change for only one product line or change for the whole company, there are many special places leaders need to pay attention to support change. Where should a leader / leadership team begin you ask? Here are 10 steps.

1. Create a plan starting with research. Speak with your stakeholders and listen to their objectives and concerns. From there define your goal. What internal talent and external talent will be involved? How do you keep people engaged who are not directly involved in the change initiative, but who you need to be supportive? Where will the biggest challenges be and how can you prepare to face them head on and minimize their impact.

2. Understand the end goal. It's critical to understand the end goal and objectives before starting out. This includes what is the evidence to support the goal?

3. Anticipate a need for flexibility. No plan is perfect, and no market is stable. Things like opportunity, technology and manpower change every day. What is your plan to keep yourself and your team in an adaptable and flexible mindset?

4. Share the plan with everyone and communicate it clearly. Leaders need to support their plan in context to every conversation they have, every meeting and every business decision. In addition, be prepared to discuss the intrinsic value of change for everyone involved – from the company all the way through to employees, suppliers and customers. Don’t make it only about costs and revenue (extrinsic value). People have to feel proud of what and why their world is changing.

5. Remember your people are people – this goes for employees, customers and suppliers. Be prepared for them to ask questions and encourage them to share their concerns. Demonstrate your commitment to them and the process. Also, recognize great work from both the people who are directly involved in the change initiative as well as those who are holding down the fort (as my dad would say), and making sure everything else is working as it should.

6. Identify champions and support those people who are respected / looked up to and great networkers. These people are likely naturally positive (glass-half-full) and patient. Your champions should be able to clearly articulate the values of the company and the value of the change initiative.

7. Delegate tasks. Everyone has to feel they are an important part of the team - it should not be something that only a ‘special few’ ever participate in or take credit for. Even the people whose work may not be changing have to see that their stability provides a foundation for the change initiative to happen.

8. Set stable, realistic objectives. This and the next step go hand-in-hand and are important for leaders to do whether they are working on a change initiative or not. To be a great leader one has to set stable, realistic objectives that everyone understands. Big-picture objectives become department objectives and then translate into individual objectives. Stable, realistic objectives allow everyone to ‘see’ how, when and why they are contributing.

9. Manage expectations. Stay connected with customers, suppliers and employees. Keep everyone informed. It’s good project management where everyone knows what is going on, and the same is true for change management. In addition, within a change environment leaders should expect conflicts will arise due to fear of status, a team members’ lack of clarification or perhaps fatigue from short-term longer than usual working hours. Whatever the reason leaders must expect this will happen and be prepared to have difficult conversations that will resolve conflict in a constructive and positive way.

10. Hold people accountable. If change is going to be successful leaders have to depend on their resources. In the case where an objective is slipping, don’t let it linger hoping it will self-correct. Get on it quickly. As with #3, anticipate flexibility. Perhaps someone’s assigned task can’t be completed as expected. That’s OK – they can still be held accountable for raising concern as soon as possible and working with the team to make necessary adjustments. 

I believe communication is a leaders most important ability when it comes to change and change management. Being a motivating, inspiring leader who demonstrates you are proud of your team and committed to open and respectful communication will be your greatest ability… equalled only with planning thoroughly and staying flexible.

There is always going to be more that could be said about change management and leading change, but I believe these 10 tips to lead your team through change gives you a good grasp of the basics. Just be careful, don’t underestimate the value of planning ahead and preparing for change. That said, don’t paralyze your initiative by getting into the loop of over-planning. One thing you may want to explore is the benefits of both Agile Project Management as Traditional Project Management. Both may have some place within your change management plans.

One final note about why we need to embrace change. If we don’t accept that change is a constant we risk falling behind our competition and failing to meet our clients’ needs. We also risk losing important talent if they:

a) Don’t feel supported and kept in-the-loop or
b) Feel their abilities and experience are falling behind their peers because change is being ignored. 

Best to embrace the challenge, the hard work and the benefits change brings us. Thanks for reading.

Bruce

About Bruce and Bruce Mayhew Consulting.

Bruce is Corporate Trainer and Executive Coach.

As a Corporate Trainer Bruce Mayhew (of BMC) specialize in customized Time Management Training, Email Etiquette Training, Leadership & New Leadership Development, Generational Differences and other soft skills training solutions in Toronto and across Canada. Bruce is also an Executive Coach to a few select clients.

BMC helps your greatest assets think productive and be productive.

Bruce is an experienced motivational speaker in Toronto and has inspired audiences across Canada and within the USA and the UK. Bruce works hard to always make sure your training event, conference, retreat, or annual general meeting is a success.